RIVALS
by BlackStreak1
Summary: The rivalry between Ben and Ricky has always been one sided with Ricky as the victor. But Ben found triumph in being a loser, and now the rivalry will be put to the final challenge who will come out as the final victor. But perhaps there never needed to be a winner. Leo realized that, but now that he is gone will Ricky or Ben realize they wasted their time.
1. Chapter 1

Ben looked at Eli angry and frustrated at the situation that Leo had placed him in. It wasn't fair for his father to do this to him after everything he had been through. He had already, suffered, sacrificed, and even bled for everyone when he was a kid. Unlike Ricky he never enjoyed his teen years because he had been thrust into a life, that he was not ready for. But, he had to admit despite the outcome, and the mistakes everyone had made it out unscathed save for himself. Now after ten years of putting the hell that was once his life behind him Leo was drawing him back into this place this hell that he was supposed to call home.

"How could he do this to me?" Ben said with anger and hurt. "After everything I have been through, he does this to me again, Eli." What the fuck did I do to deserve this didn't he think I suffered enough, and he does this! TO ME!" "He must have truly hated me, for some reason." Ben said leaning against the fireplace and breathing heavily against the mantle. "Ben, no offense my friend, but what's done is done, and your dad is dead. I'm pretty sure you can't make him change his will now. I mean I'm not exactly dressed to dig up a dead man and force him to rise from the dead and rewrite his will. But, I'm down if that is what you want to do" he said jokingly.

"Ben, just come to terms with this, analyze the situation, and then we'll come up with a solution to this problem like we have in the past. Think of this as just another deadline, we have to meet." Tess said with a smile as she placed a consoling hand on his back. "Tess this is not a normal problem, and this is not a situation that I was prepared to have or accept. My father knew fully well, what I asked him to do, and he knew what I wanted of him. Then like he always does he disregards what I wanted for myself and tries to force me to follow his golden foot steps, like a good little dog." Ben said turning and removing her hand from his back. He didn't want or need consoling from anyone. Unlike others Ben never liked that, he never liked to need someone, not anymore and he knew Tess all to well once upon a time she wanted to be the one he needed, but then like now Ben didn't want it.

Ben had been through a lot and he had sacrificed for everyone Amy, Ricky, Adrian, Dylan, Henry, and Alice. He was done with his sacrificing, and he would never do it again. What Leo now asked of him was wrong and he had no right to alter his will the way he did casting Ben into the fire that he spent years freezing. Ben left Glenn Valley and never wanted to return save for the two times in the year when he would keep a promise to the only two people in the world he felt he still owed anything too. But now Leo had turned his tribute to Mercy, and his mother into something he would loathe and he would never forgive Leo for this.

**THREE HOURS EARLIER...**

Ben, Camille, Chloe, Adrian, Betty, Bunny, Cindy, Amy, Henry, Alice, and John all sat in the office of "ENRIQUEZ & LEE FAMILY LAW SERVICES", with Rueben behind his desk. He decided the best way to be part of Adrian' life was to be apart of the one thing both shared an interest in the Law so when she graduated from Law school he retired as the District Attorney and opened a small private practice with Leo as his first client and took Adrian on as his partner. She handled mostly the family, adoption, and divorce cases, he handled the business, and criminal cases. The two had done well together in the two and half years they were in business. It was a comfort too Adrian when she had to file for divorce from Omar after being married for four years.

They had no kids and that made it easy, too Adrian if they had any he would have probably questioned the paternity since he questioned her when he found his brother kissing her and she said that he had forced himself on her. Dante however lied and claimed she came onto him. Adrian had actually told Dante she and Omar were having problems since she was the primary bread winner and when Leo stopped paying for the condo they discovered the money he earned was not enough to pay the bills. Mostly he argued with her about selling the engagement ring and bracelet Ben had given her saying they should not be that important since she and Ben were no longer together. When she thought Dante was being a good brother in law and tried to console her he kissed her and refused to break off. When Omar came in and saw. Dante immediately went on the defense and Omar believed his brother, and so did the rest of the family. So they parted ways, and honestly she realized that she and Omar had started to part ways long before that incident.

Now she was back to living with her family, and they were actually happy together. Ricky and Amy were together with another child a little boy named Martin, and Grace and Jack were pregnant with twins. Henry and Alice were also married with one boy named Ben. All of them were somewhat happy, they all had their problems, but the main person who had difficulty was Ricky who felt guilty that Leo and Ben never repaired their relationship. Everyone thought that everything with Ben was okay but it wasn't. Ben put up a front making believe to everyone save for Leo who also pretended, and Chloe that everything was okay. When Ben graduated he simply left the very night with an early acceptance to summer program in Vancouver for Journalism. There he actually paid his own tuition and refused to accept money from Leo to help with school or bills. He worked two jobs, as waiter, and a Librarian and kept a 3.85 GPA to maintain a scholarship, and financial aid where he studied Journalism and business. Most would think it impossible, but Ben having been emancipated himself from Leo to marry Adrian worked in his favor.

From there Ben moved into a three bedroom flat with Eli and Marcus Reed, two brother's who each along with Ben had distinct personalities. Eli was an accounting major who loved to party sometimes while Marcus was majoring in Advertising and marketing who was a fitness nut. Ben also spent time as a tutor having excelled in Math, it was in this he met Tess who took a liking to Ben immediately. She paid Ben ten dollars an hour for three hours, three days a week, to help her get a B in Advanced AP CALCULUS a course Ben breezed through. She really liked the fact he made the work easier to understand and she got an A instead. She wanted Ben to see her as more than a friend, but Ben told her relationships, and love were two things he would never be good at, and decided to just be a friend. But Eli, Marcus, and Tess all agreed Ben was a good friend, but he refused to really let them into his world.

What shocked Tess was Ben's social life Ben usually worked, went to class, studied, showered, and slept. But on the occasional times he had time all saw Ben was fairly good at picking up women for one night stands. Ben had changed while living in Canada and put on both muscle and weight in order to deal with the cold of the area. This made his Italian and Irish looks arise in full form which made him quite desirable to the women of the area. The fact that his last name was Boykewich was also a much needed boost, but Ben made sure to always choose specific days, and to use at least three means of defense against both disease, and impregnation.

When he graduated at the age of 21 he took an internship for a paper in London, and began to help with putting the paper into an online e-zine. But he didn't stop there and was awarded a job as a field reporter for the youth group to catch the attention of ages 12 to 28 when he was 23. With this Ben was given his own column every week. But Ben was not happy with just one story every week, he saw that the youth of the world all had stories to tell, and he wanted the rest of the world to read them. He wanted to give a voice to the voiceless the kids who were not accepted, those who were looked over and forgotten. The ones who didn't have the body of Taylor Lautner or the looks of Taylor Swift. He wanted the fat kids, the thin geeks, the nerds to all have a say in what they wanted and the stories should not be separated in different magazines they should all be as one, he wanted to bridge the gap among the different kids, ethnic groups, the grunges, the punks, the rappers, the cheerleaders, the band geeks, the jocks, the forgotten ones like himself.

So Ben using his own money started a small online printed magazine called THE IN CROWD & THE OTHER CROWD" or TIC TOC. Ben chose that name and with Marcus's help came up the slogan "Because Time is Winding down on everyone so why waste time not knowing." With that Ben went throughout London writing down the stories, experiences of kids in private schools, public schools, and boarding schools. He investigated all their interests likes and dislikes, and the reason's why they liked or disliked other topics. Ben never thought his magazine would get much praise, but only a year and sixteen issues later his own paper asked him if he would like to publish TIC TOC full time with their publishing firm and them as a backer, but he would remain the soul proprietor as EDITOR in CHIEF. Ben quickly took their offer after having a friend look at the deal through and iron out all the details, he was a Boykewich and they did know how to run a business.

TIC TOC became so successful that Ben was given the funding to open an office in both Canada, and America to get the full global outlook of the community of youth. But Ben's greatest accomplishment came at 26 when he did an article about the starving children of the South African countries. All of his friends and his business partners were worried for his safety when he went their to bring about the attention of the world to kids who were truly forgotten. Ben told of how many were forced into child labor, prostitution, and being soldiers. He told of their hardships and of how difficult it was for some of them to live past the age of twelve because of the dangers they faced just to go to sleep at night. This saddened all of his readers in his six month story run. With this the kids of the world started their own movement to help by using his magazine to start the online organization KID. KIDS IN DISTRESS. This organization helped kids with only Ben giving them a few pages in the magazine, and online server help to start organizations and drives to help aid other children around the world.

With Ben's desire to do good came dangers, Ben while in South Africa contracted KROHN's Disease and nearly died and had to have part of his stomach removed for eating bacteria infected food. Ben also had several death threats that were sent to him, which forced many to take action on his behalf to ensure his protection. This worried his father whom Ben had barely spoken too or visited since Christmas of his Freshmen year in college, and even then he only visited for a few hours to drop off gifts and apologize. In his time gone Adrian, Amy, Grace, Ricky, Henry, Alice, Jack, and even Clementine all made attempts to contact or visit Ben, but he would either give them an excuse or not accept their calls and messages. This made him miss Adrian and Amy's double wedding as well as the birth of his name sake. However no one could blame him for not wanting to be near them anymore they all had to admit they set fire to the bridges they built with Ben some time ago, and Ben had no interest in rebuilding them.

But, Ben's friendship with Marcus, Eli, and Tess grew. When Ben returned to America he asked each one to join him in his company to continue his success. This pleased all three, and made the paper a fairly normal earning of 22.5 million dollars a year for the past three years, with a staff of 190 people mostly of young college kids looking for extra money, experience, college credit, or the opportunity to have their voices and stories told. Ben's greatest reporter was Tyler Anderson who was a young man who was the victim of a school shooting. Tyler was actually friends with the shooter. Tyler held no ill toward his shooter Anthony Collins who took a semi automatic hand gun to school to get back at bullies who humiliated him everyday because his mom had to work as a stripper to make money. Anthony had shot eight people and killed three, when Tyler found him they wrestled for the gun and it went off twice one bullet shot Tyler in the lung, and the other hit Anthony in the heart killing him.

Tyler explained that many kids who kill themselves or commit violent crimes like this generally start out as good kids, but others push, ridicule, and taunt them to a point of depression, and anger. Tyler came to work for Ben through a program Eli had helped to set up called G.U.N. Growing Up Nervous. Which tried to help reach out to kids who were hurt, ridiculed, and bullied. The program put them in touch with other kids who felt this way to let them know they were not alone, and their were other ways beside Suicide, Drugs, and Violence to help kids deal with their problems. Tyler enjoyed working for Ben because TIC TOC allowed him to tell Anthony's story without making him look like a psycho or a monster. Anthony and he were friends, and had grown up together, but all because he was not athletic, or cute he was outcast. Many people in his home town tried to make him look like a hero after stopping Tyler, but he felt as though he was the murderer for not being able to help his friend. Tyler even refused to go to the award ceremony the town had for him, and moved away. He said he hated the school for having put Anthony and other kids through that event, he also told Ben in confidence he sometimes wanted to join Tyler in death, and in the shooting spree. Ben let Tyler know it was alright he knew too well how he felt.

Ben knew because his life in high school was similar. No one really understood the taunts and name calling he had to endure for being with both Adrian and Amy. To them Ricky was a smooth operator for getting the rich idiot to take care of his sluts. Many believed that Ricky was the father of Adrian's baby, or that she got pregnant on purpose to get Ben's money. They also said how easy it was for him to be duped, by three women Amy, Adrian, and Dylan. They thought it was funny how Henry got car by his father for fucking his wife, and trying to fuck his girlfriend. Ricky got a job an apartment for as they claimed making Ben his BITCH. Ben had to hear all of this and it got worse when they discovered Omar was living with Adrian, but Ben didn't mind to him it was his punishment for their happiness, and he had learned no one can be happy without making someone else sad. The only one who knew of what Ben truly went through was Chloe who rumors spread that his dad hired a hooker for Ben to keep him out of trouble. Many times Ben would have to fight or pay someone to keep those rumors from spreading. This made Chloe truly hate all of Ben's friends, and understand why Ben stayed away from home. But all of that would now change.

PRESENT STORY PLACEMENT.

Well now that everyone has arrived I will begin the video recording made by Leonardo Davincci Boykewich for all those present and as for mentioned in this will, according to his wishes.

"Hello everyone, I hope you are happy despite the occasion for which you have all been called." Leo said as his voice was put on the holo projector.

If you are seeing this then that means I have departed this world, and hopefully I have been reunited with my friends, and family in the next." he said with a smile. This made Camille and Chloe cry since they would never be able to see him or that smile again. Adrian and Amy both looked to Ben who was seated between them and tried to comfort them. They thought seeing Leo for the last time like that would get some emotion from him but like the funeral, Ben remained calm and composed. It was almost eerie to them how he had changed so much from the kind and gentle boy they both loved to this hardened man they saw before them. This made them even sadder because both knew that they were somewhat if not completely responsible for this change in his demeanor.

Ricky smiled and began to sniffle and let out tears as he watched this, unlike the funeral where he broke down and cried and had to have Amy and George lead him away when he tried to say a few kind words about Leo. Ben however was the same, he spoke many kind and moving words about Leo, but his eyes were unflinching to show sadness or weakness for losing the last of his family, having his uncle die a few years earlier. Everyone went to the funeral in order to try and help Camille, Chloe, and Ben deal with the loss, but Ben proved that he was more than capable of helping his step mother and sister deal with Leo's passing. Adrian looked completely at Ben from the beginning of the procession to the end, and was stunned at Ben's composure. To be honest everyone was, especially Henry and Alice who had known how close Ben was Leo and thought that losing his father would destroy their friend. They both agreed they didn't really help him after his mom, or his daughter died, but they would definitely be there for him now. They were all ashamed of how the one time they were ready to be there to help Ben deal with hardship was when he no longer needed them.

Now like the funeral three days prior Ben was consoling his mom, and sister without showing any signs of grief at all. Many were worried that Ben's absence from home had destroyed his relationship with Leo. When Amy talked to Ricky about this, he told her it was Ben probably dealing with the fact that Leo would not leave the company to him, and he wanted to prepare himself for that. Ricky had to admit that he liked Ben, being gone because it gave him time to develop a bond with Leo. This bond helped him be promoted swiftly through the company and now he was vice president of marketing. But in the last two years of seeing how Ben had gained his own success Ricky saw that his relationship with Leo had diminished. Leo even asked him to stop letting John call him Gramps. He was very upset with Leo when he asked why.

_"Ricky I love you like a son, but you aren't my son. Despite how I feel about John he isn't my grandson, and from how things are going I will never live to see my own grandchild." Leo said with a sad voice. "Leo I don't mind, and I love you like a Dad, you are way beyond my real father. And John loves you as much as he loves Shaker and George probably even more. I love Shaker and George too, but I bond to you the most, and if Ben doesn't appreciate you I will." Ricky said with sincerity. But hearing Ricky say that Ben didn't appreciate him only made Leo angry, and he simply said. "Ricky I'm not your father, and you are not my son, I am Ben's father and he is my son. Even though he and I are distant, he will always be my son and the person who I love and care for more than anyone else. So I'm asking you to just stop John from calling me Grampa". Leo then turned and walk_e_d away._


	2. Chapter 2

What Leo said to him really hurt Ricky, and he could not figure what could have caused such a change in his relationship with Leo. He pondered it and could not figure out what was wrong. As this situation continued to irritate him he asked Amy if she knew if he or John had done anything to upset Leo that would make him distance himself from them. Amy looked at her husband and told him to look at the calendar. Ricky saw that it was Thursday January 23'rd. But Ricky still could not figure out what she meant until, he remembered Adrian. Every year Adrian at this time would become depressed, and distraught, because this would be another year Mercy never lived.

Leo also felt a little depressed about this time of year, but never so depressed he would be this mean, and cold toward him. So in order to figure out what was happening he talked with Nora, who still worked as Leo's assistant. Although Nora had noticed the depressive state Leo was in as well she had no answer to why he was acting like this. To be honest she too had become worried, especially after he had just come from Europe on an urgent matter that he was asked to attend by overseas investors. So Ricky went to the only person he knew that could shed some light on the situation, Bunny who had retired but still maintained control over the Boykewich Butchers.

When Ricky entered the shop he was reminiscent of this place and how it made him feel, the nostalgia of being back, and remembering how he and Ben used to work together cleaning and filling orders. He had since moved from the shop into the Jeurgen home which was given to he and Amy as a gift from George and Anne. George had since moved in with Kathleen, and Anne took up permanent residence in Palm Springs. This pleased Nora who was happy to have her son and his family so close which would help them rebuild their relationship, and gave her extra incentive to stay clean and sober. As Ricky walked through the doors there was Bunny helping a customer as she usually did. She might have retired, but she just couldn't stay away from the shop.

Hey there Mr. Vice President how is everything with the family and work?" she asked and embraced him in a hug. "I'm good Bunny and so is my family, you should stop by and see John and Martin they are both getting so big." he said with a big smile. "I'll try and do that" she replied and took a look a the troubled young man she knew so long ago. Ricky was now a success, and looking very handsome despite his now receding hairline which was the only evidence he was Bob's son. "So why are you here, I don't think you came back to this place to see me, or did you think you could sneak me up to the apartment. Remember I still have security cameras installed." she joked. "No, Bunny nothing like that I came to ask if you know why Leo is so irritated with me." he asked looking a bit sad.

"Well considering what happened two weeks ago I'm not surprised." she responded and wondering why he was shocked at Leo's change in attitude. "What are you talking about Bunny, what happened two weeks ago." Ricky asked confused. "Ben nearly died Ricky!" she said looking stunned he didn't know. "DIED! What happened to Ben." he asked worried. "Ricky, Ben contracted a bacterial infection while working on an important story for his magazine in South Africa." she responded. "Bacterial Infection, how did he get that." Ricky said worried. "Its south Africa Ricky not everything there is sanitary, and Ben was new to that area, so his body had no build up defense to the germs as some of the lucky adults who live to grow up develop. Ben could have gotten it from the food he ate, the water he drank or even a mosquito bite or swallowing the air. Almost 80% of the slums he visited to talk to the kids there is contaminated with germs, and disease." She said.

"Is he okay is he out of the hospital" Ricky asked concerned for Ben's safety. "He's fine, and from what Leo told me he was in and out of the hospital after the surgery and back here in the sometimes sanitized U.S." she replied. "Surgery, Ben had to have surgery, were there any complications." Ricky asked. "Not many, he had to have part of his stomach removed, and he will have to live with KROHNS disease for the rest of his life. But he is alive and okay." she said somewhat saddened by what she was telling Ricky. "Why didn't Leo say anything we could have done something to help him, or at least tried he stated. "He wanted to, but Ben's assistant had strict instructions from Ben should anything ever happen to him not to make a big deal about it or let it get out." she said. "What the hell would Ben do something like that for? Doesn't he know we all care about him, and worry." Ricky asked. "Ricky its Ben, he stopped relying on us a long time ago." Bunny replied feeling guilty that her relationship with Ben after so many years, was now non existent. She had been part of Ben's life since the day he was born, and she worked as Leo's replacement. Ben was like a second son to her and now he didn't even have faith that she would care he if his life was in danger.

Bunny hated to think that Ben of all people had doubts that she cared about him. Ben stopped coming to her for advice when he quit, and left for his summer intern program. Bunny had tried to arrange a surprise gift for him before he left, but Ben never told anyone he was leaving not even Leo. He had showed up at the graduation, took his diploma and the moment the procession was over he was gone. Leo had Bunny arrange a big hotel party to celebrate for all the students, specifically Ben and all his friends. But when Leo arrived home with Camille, and Chloe they only found his car and the keys with a letter telling Chloe the Mercedes was hers. He had taken only a few clothes and possessions, and like that he was gone. When Leo looked for answers the guidance counselor informed him that Ben had been researching scholarships, and other programs in colleges far away. Ben having a high GPA was able to get accepted to almost every university, the only ones that did not accept him were those that worried about Ben and his reputation for careless behavior as exhibited in his record of the school fire, his altercation with Omar, and his divorce record. His web video of passing out drunk was also a hindrance.

Ben however was accepted to the University of Vancouver and turned down the acceptance to the college in New York. Leo only needed two days before he discovered Ben's location and was furious with him for just leaving without even telling anyone. Ben assured him he did not want to upset anyone, but he wanted to be on his own. He had been through a lot in high school and it was time he lived his life in a place where no one knew him or cared about his past or his stupid mistakes. Being the Sausage Prince, had never made him happy and it was time he got to be happy. Leo was embarrassed and sad at what Ben told him, but he had to agree. But, one thing he wished for Ben is that he would find happiness, and love, even if he would lose him in the process. Ben looked at Leo and told him "Love is curse for me dad, because the ones I love never love me, and the ones that do love me let me down. Leo tried to protest Ben's words, but Ben refused to hear it. This made Leo sad, because his son didn't understand without love there is no happiness.

When Bunny heard this from Leo she found it difficult to accept, she made a promise to Sarah to help Ben in any way she could, and watch out for him. This was a promise that Sarah made everyone accept, her, Leo, Camille, and all of the servants. She truly worried about her son and the life he would live without her guidance. Now she Leo, Camille all felt that they had broken their promise to her. Bunny felt that this was because both she and Leo had concentrate too much on trying to force Ben to do the right thing. After looking at how Ricky's life had turned out all had agreed perhaps Ben making his own choices without their interference would have been better. What Bunny discovered about Leo is he felt guilty for forcing Ben to be friends with Ricky. Also for not putting a stop to his relationship with Amy, when he discovered she was pregnant. It was not Ben's responsibility, and he thought perhaps he should have let Ricky follow and make his own decisions, instead of influencing them. Ricky had parents, and his interference is probably what caused all of his son's problems.

When Tess contacted Leo about Ben being hospitalized he immediately flew to the hospital in New Guinea where Ben had been transferred to see to Ben's well being. When he found Ben he had been diagnosed as having a 104.0 fever and dehydrated. The doctor had to perform emergency surgery and put Ben on immediate antibiotics to treat the infection and placed him in sterilized environment. When he got there Leo met Tess, Eli, and Markus for the very first time. In all the years Ben had been gone he had never told Ben about his life or the people in it with him. He was never even allowed by Ben to visit him in Vancouver, because Ben didn't want everyone to know his dad was famous. This made Leo feel horrible to think his son was embarrassed by him or worse ashamed. When Leo met his friends he was surprised at the amount of information that they knew about the person his son was, and astonished at how much they wanted to know about Ben. Unfortunately before they even got a chance to really share stories Tess gave Leo an envelope with instructions of how Ben wanted his affairs to be handled should a situation arise.

When Leo received this document he was shocked that Ben being only 26 had already prepared a will. Leo looked to Tess and asked, "You seem to know my son better than I do considering you work so closely to him, has there ever been anything between you two? If I maybe so bold to ask?" Leo asked a little embarrassed. "Its okay Mr. Boykewich, but no Ben and I have never been anything more than close friends, and I am married to Markus now so it will never happen." she said with an understanding and sad expression. "Please call me Leo, but did you ever have any feelings for him, its just something about the way you act about Ben, that is similar to how my wife acted around me. She was my assistant for nearly 24 years and I never realized how she felt until it was almost too late." Leo explained. Mr. Boykewich I'm not going to lie, I did have very strong romantic feelings for your son, but he ignored all my advances, and refused to take a chance with me. I know it was for the best because now I am with a wonderful man who is the light of my life, but it doesn't stop me from feeling some regret of not knowing what I could have had with your son. He is truly a remarkable man, but something in him is broken and he knows it, but refuses to fix it." Tess replied with remorse.

"I know, its' something that broke in him when his mom died, and became irreparable when his daughter died." Leo said. "I know and can somewhat understand what you mean." Tess replied. "The only time Ben takes a vacation are two days a year, and both are top return home and celebrate the deaths of his mom, and Mercy." Tess continued. "Ben still comes home to visit their graves?" Leo asked. "Yes, doesn't he visit you on those trips back as well?" Tess asked. "No, I have always thought that Ben stays away, and he hasn't been home for seven years." Leo said shocked at this new information that Ben kept his promise on visiting Sarah and Mercy. This was strange and even sadder to Leo not only was Ben making preparations for his death at a young age, but he was more comfortable with the dead it seems than he was with the living. Had he let his son sink so far into depression that Ben no longer cared if he lived or died.

**PRESENT STORY ARC.**

"So is he okay then" Ricky asked Bunny. "Yes he is fine and thousands of people live with KRONHNS everyday like Ben. There is treatment but no real cure. Leo said that Ben is planning on having surgery done to have it placed in remission as soon as he is done with his treatments. she explained. "So why is Leo taking out his frustration of what is happening with Ben on John and I. Ricky asked. "He's not taking anything out on you Ricky, Leo is just realizing that while he spent so much time with you and your family, he neglected his own." Bunny explained. "Bunny, nobody made Ben leave or stay away he chose to do that on his own. Am I sorry for how everything turned out, yes but if Ben wants to pout let him. Why should Leo have to put up with his crap and get mad at my family because of Ben's arrogance." he said angrily. "Ricky may I remind you if this was pouting it wouldn't last for so many years. Also it is Leo's problem because Ben is his son, and if you truly are sorry you would understand that and accept it. Ben had to accept a lot because of you, and we both know you yourself could have handled this situation a lot better.

Your family is not going to suffer because Leo is not around. Your son's have two other grand father's as well as three grandmothers, and a host of uncles, and aunts courtesy of Shakur and Margaret. "Ben doesn't have that luxury of an extended family nor does Leo. Leo's brother Adolfo died two years ago, and Sarah had no other family. Ben is his only living blood heir, and his first born son from the first woman he ever loved and the love of his life. Sarah, and Ben are the reason Boykewich Int. exists and if you had known the relationship between them before high school you would be ashamed and sad for how they are now. If you had known his mom you would truly understand how Ben was able to deal with all he went through with all of you, and where his ability to love came from. You think that you had it rough with your childhood, but I saw what losing his mom did to him, and that puts both you and Ben dead even. The difference is he made the unselfish choices when it came to dealing with his pain. Ben and Leo paid a price for the happiness we all have now and that includes you and your family. Leo is trying find a way to do for Ben what he did for all of you." Bunny said with both anger and love. "Whats that?" Ricky asked a little ashamed of his response about Ben. "Save him." Bunny said.


	3. Chapter 3

Well I have decided to stop this story because events have taken place which made me stop. The following will show some scenes that would have happened. Leo left Ben his company in an attempt to gain some forgiveness and understanding from Ben since he believes that he allowed Ricky to come between he and Ben. It also showed how he was sorry he never tried to understand how difficult it was for Ben to deal with so much at such a young age.

From being there for Amy after she was pregnant byRicky, to having him take this Ricky under his wing and put him in a place in his life that was almost equal to him, and actually force him to accept each situation without really understanding how difficult that would be. He also had a nightmare where his wife was furious with him for allowing her son to leave and not want to return. This prompted him to want to change the situation, but Ben now being more mature didn't want to alter his life any longer to accommodate anyone including his father.

Ricky on the other hand would have been angry because he wanted to have it all. Leo, Amy, his friendships with Adrian, Grace, Jack, Omar, and Alice and Henry, as well as the company. But unknown to him two people stood in his way and they would never allow him to have the company. Camille, and Chloe who in his will Leo would have left 25 percent of his company.

Despite Leo's attempt to leave Ben the company who knew Ben would refuse so in order to ensure Ben would have to accept his offer, he created a stipulation that stated Ben's wishes to have his entire inheritance turned into a foundation to cater to troubled youths would not be activated until he ran the company for one full year. At which point a new CEO would be named. The money from Ben's stocks in both his magazine, and his father's company would go to continued funding of this organization called THE MERCY FOUNDATION in honor of his little girl.

There would have been drama like an argument between Ben and Ricky regarding Nora whom Ben transferred from being his assistant to the head of the personnel department. Ricky would have questioned Ben about his decision angrily because Leo had his mom as an assistant, but Ben having put up with Ricky's crap in high school and after being the boss in his own magazine doesn't want to be confronted by him.

Here is how the conversation would have gone.

Ricky: Why would you move my mom to a new position she knows this company better than anyone. Ben she helped your Dad for ten years, and you just transfer her like that.

Ben: Ricky, your mom was my Dad's assistant and he did business differently from me. I spoke with Nora already about the situation and she was more than understanding about why I didn't want her as my assistant and more than reasonable about the position I was giving her. Also you should understand that my Dad is no longer the CEO of this company I am. And I will not be questioned about who I have working for me as MY ASSISTANT.

Ricky: I'm just asking Ben why would you not want her as your assistant.

Ben: Ricky that is not your business, and neither is this company. Its mine, so remind yourself of that and never let me have this conversation with you again.

Ricky: You know what Ben its been years and you are still the same kid you were in High School.

Ben: Ricky I stopped being that kid a very long time ago. And if you ever question me again or try to act as my superior I will remind you that you are not my superior in any way. Not in life and especially in this company.

Ricky: Well I must be in some way because Amy and Adrian thought so.

Ben: Yes, they did. But my Dad didn't. Or other wise you would be the one behind this desk and not me.

Ricky: The only reason you are there Ben is because your Dad felt he owed you something.

Ben: No, Ricky he knew unlike you I owe no one nothing. The business I have I started with my own hand just like he started this one, and my Grandfather started the butcher shop, and my uncle started his hotel. I never wanted this company, because unlike how you so wanted, and wished to be his son. I am his son. Boykewich men do for themselves and take responsibility for their own. We are no strangers to hard work or dedication.

Ricky: Yeah, well I guess the work I did with Amy and Adrian was a bit harder than yours.

Ben: Probably, but then again that is the only work you can do well.

Ricky: You are still jealous of me for having John, Amy, and Adrian like I thought.

Ben: Ricky, I am not jealous or envious of you. I pity you. Because I don't have a family, or any children. But I have a clear conscience. My daughter died before she was born, but I was there for her from the very beginning. I didn't have someone else sacrifice or bleed for my child. Nor did I ever deny her to anyone. You did. No matter what you have. I might not have a wife and kids, but what I do have I worked for, and no one else is responsible for helping me get it.

Ricky: Everything I have Ben I worked for too.

Ben: You had me and anyone else do the hard work. Were you the one who stayed by Amy's side while she was pregnant with John or was that me. How long exactly did it take you before you even acknowledge to everyone you were the father, and it was you who got her pregnant. Did you ever tell John how you treated Amy while she was pregnant with him.

Ricky: I made mistakes Ben, I admit that, but I changed to be there for Amy and John.

Ben: (Clapping hands) Bravo Ricky, it only took you screwing up her relationship with me, and fucking half the girls in high school and the surrounding area to do it. I was there for Amy and that was never my child. I did it while Adrian was carrying my child. I did it after my child died, and Adrian was so depressed, I had to stay up for hours while she slept because I was afraid she might hurt herself if I didn't. I did it when both Amy and Adrian said they wanted you and not me. I did it when my two best friends betrayed me, and I almost went to jail for a crime I didn't even commit. I stood my ground when my father lost faith in me, and started grooming you as his new son. I did it when my sister needed me to be there for her,when people found out about her past life. I did it for your little brother when his girlfriend broke up with him.

Ricky: Well give you a medal, Ben but no one ever asked you too do any of that stuff. No one owes you anything for that.

Ben: You're right they didn't so ask yourself, "WHY I DID IT RICKY". Because I had to do it. Because if I didn't do it who else would have. You. Amy had to be pregnant, be in a troubled relationship with me, and you had fuck Adrian, and her head up before you were even there for her. I never did it for a reward Ricky. I did it because unlike you I knew they needed me, and I'm not comfortable sitting in the sidelines watching people suffer, or causing them to suffer.

Ricky: I never made anyone suffer Ben.

Ben: Really? What would you call how Amy cried about her situation being. Or Adrian hurting from the lies, the cheating, and using her for sex? But, let me guess, its not your fault because you were molested.

Ricky: Yes, Ben I was molested and that screwed me up. You don't know how that feels or what that does to you. So don't you dare stand and make judgements about me or what I did.

Ben: Yes, I can. I lost my mom when I was 10. That didn't make me go out and screw every older woman I met. I lost Amy after I slept with Adrian, and that didn't make me do bad things to you or anyone else. I lost my daughter when I was seventeen, and that didn't make me abandon Adrian or anyone else. I lost my marriage when I was eighteen and I didn't blame you or anyone else for that, but me. So grow the fuck up, Ricky. You aren't the first person who's dad touched him, and sadly enough I know from my work you weren't even the last. I know about hundred's to thousands of cases of boys, girls, men, and women who have suffered for years by people like Bob, and worse. That didn't make them hurt others. Chloe was in a worse situation than you and she never once blamed any of her mistakes on her past.

But, you Ricky are just full of excuses. It was not your fault, its Bob's because he touched you. Your dad didn't make you sleep with anyone. Your dad wasn't there that night you slept with Amy without a condom, knowing you could have given her much worse than a pregnancy. He wasn't there any of the times you were with Adrian. He wasn't there any of the times you stood and lied to me claiming to be my friend. You did all of that on your own. Your father was a monster, but you were the one who chose to use what he did to you, as an excuse to hurt and use so many others. Man up and take responsibility for your mistakes.

I accept responsibility for all of my fuck ups. I fucked up my relationship with Amy, when I dated her. Just like I slept with Adrian and got her pregnant. Just like I fucked up my marriage to Adrian, and my relationship with my dad. I can admit that because those are my mistakes. I made them, and I accept the responsibility for them. I don't pass the buck like you Ricky, because I might not be the man Adrian, Amy, or anyone in this God forsaken town wanted, but I am man enough to know why and admit it to myself.

But I accepted that, and I fixed my life without pulling anyone else down with me. I left everything I loved, and knew to start over. I worked to get my life back to a point where I liked myself again. I worked two jobs to go to school, and graduate with a degree in Journalism, and Business with a 3.75 GPA. I made friends with my roommates, that has lasted almost ten years. I wrote every article and online blog that got me noticed by newpapers, and magazines. I applied and worked like a dog for the London Press. I went out and got the stories that other people were not interested in writitng so I could give a voice to kids like me, you, Amy, Adrian, and everyone else.

I started my own magazine with my own hard work and a little bit of money given to me by my uncle Alfredo after he died. So Ricky what have you ever been able to done on your own. Now, get out of my office, and go back to yours Mr. Underwood. Ben said that with emphasis as his hand landed on the name plate on his desk which read "MR. BOYKEWICH". The name plate that Leo kept from his father. He did that to remind Ricky, Boykewich was his last name not Ricky's.

The rest of the story would have Ricky angry that Ben asked Clementine to be his new assistant as well. Ricky believes he did this in an attempt to get the one girl he never had, but Ben only did it to give Clementine a helping hand since she could not find work other than being the manager of a small coffee shop after college. In an odd turn of events Clementine begins to develop feelings for Ben, feelings Ben does not reciprocate. In his office one night she kisses him and Ricky looks on. Ben instead of continuing the kiss breaks off and lets her know he has no romantic feelings for her or anyone. Ben although is successful has grown cold to the ways of romance. Having his heart broken by all of his former friends has kept him distant from everyone including his friends. Eli, Marcus, and Tess.

Through them she learns the only time Ben ever really relaxes is when he celebrates the deaths of his mother and daughter. The reason why they are all so loyal to Ben is because in the darkest times in their life Ben was there to give them comfort just as he did for Amy, Adrian, Ricky, and Chloe. Eli was engaged to a beautiful girl who was killed in a car accident. In his darkest hour he tried to commit suicide until Ben stopped him, and helped him overcome her death by helping him to see that killing himself would not be what his fiancee Claire would have wanted. Like he and Adrian Marcus and Tess lost a child, through miscarriage. But unlike he and Adrian, Ben traveled from Europe to Canada, and used his own money to start his Canada Office in order to help them through that ordeal. He told them of how when he and Adrian lost their child they're friends offered little to know comfort because they were to young, and selfish to handle such an ordeal, but he would not abandon them as his friends did him.

Despite his current emotions toward love, she learned Ben had been involved with other women his first relationship was with Cara Ramirez a raven haired young woman who had a promiscuous nature like Adrian, whom Ben had as a FRIEND WITH BENEFITS relationship which lasted until a few months ago when she met a person whom she wanted to settle down with. When Ben returned to Canada she and he had one last fling, and she asked him if he wanted to be more than friends, Ben not wanting to experience that pain said no. He said goodbye to her and wished her luck, and love in her new romance. She simply said she wished it was with him.

Another relationship was with Felicia, a red haired photographer from New York, Ben met while living in London. They met while working for the same paper, and had a small office romance. Even though they had a lot in common Ben refused her advances as well to be in a full committed relationship. The last and most disappointing relationship was with Raven. A Native-American professor whom Ben met while working on a story about teenagers of the Native America, and how they continued their old traditions of transitioning them from childhood to teen years to adult-hood. Ben wrote about the conditions that their tribe had to live under, and the difficulties many of the kids had to get a proper education. Because of his story the Native American Counsel after 235 years gave the U. S. its first Native American founded University. Called NATU Native American Tribal University.

Raven was a few years older than Ben, but she was very beautiful and was a Dr. of Anthropology, and Cultural History. She and Ben according to Tess were so good together. Unfortunately Raven wanted to be more than friends, and she made that obvious to Ben. However Ben was a man of his word and he ignored her advances as well. She was now engaged and pregnant to one of her colleagues. This made Clementine feel bad for how a great person like Ben, could be so kind and lonely at the same time. She learns that most of the time Ben just has one night stands or useless one week relationships with women. They find it so wrong because Ben knows the name of every woman he slept with and even has all of their contact information. What surprised most was Ben even helped some of them with jobs or bad situations they were in. But all were just meaningless flings for him. Clementine feels bad for Ben, but thanks to her new found friendship with Ben and his friends she begins to develop feelings for Eli and he for her.

Ricky later confronts Clementine about her relationship with Ben, who is offended by his accusations about she and Ben. This incidents gets a prompt slap to the face for Ricky, and angry words from Clementine. She then relates news of Ben to Adrian, Amy, Grace, and Alice, about Ben and his impromptu life. This situation makes all of them guilty about how they all had some part in Ben's emotional shut down. It is in this reasoning that Clementine talks to Ben about his past sexual life and how it came about. Ben then tells her that out of all the women he slept with only three of these women had any signicance. Adrian, Cara, and Alice which shocks Clementine to learn of her and Ben's encounter. She later recants this news to the rest of the group which causes a scene between Alice and Adrian.

Chloe was engaged to her college boyfriend Adam, and invited everyone. Since Leo was gone she asked her brother to give her away at her wedding. During the ceremony Ben gave a toast which made everyone shed a tear since he reminded everyone of how difficult love was to find, have, and also hold onto. He also let them no love was worth having and not letting go of. This made all who really knew Ben understand despite his demeanor of never wanting to be in love again, he truly yearned and desired it. In attendance was Grant/ Lauren married. Madison/ Jason married. Cathy/ David Married. Ethan/Daffney dating. Omar/ Adrian for looks only. Ricky/ Amy married but mad. Jack / Grace Married with child. Henry/ Alice married. Tess/ Martin. Clementine/ Eli dating. Reuben/ Cindy still married. George/ Kathleen Married. Tammy/ Tom married one child. Zoe / Joe dating. Bunny/ her husband. Betty/ her husband. Anne/ Nora dating. Camille/ missing Leo.

During the slow dance Ben danced with Camille who cried because dancing with him reminded her of Leo, and how he missed being able to give Chloe away. However Ben's former guidance counselor Mr. Molina was in attendance was there to give her some comfort. It is during this that Ben left the wedding and drove directly to the cemetery. Because Chloe had deliberately scheduled her wedding on Mercy's birthday in an attempt to relieve Ben of his pain. She wanted to associate the saddest day of her brothers life with a happy one. As he left only one person knew where he would be going and followed.

Ben left his car and walked to the markers of his father, mother, and...daughter. He looked at all three headstones and breathe in the cold air and fell to his knees. He reached out with both arms to touch the cold stone of Sarah and Leo who were separated by Mercy, and leaned his head against Mercy's headstone and cried for not being able to join them in death. As he cried he felt someone touch his back and wrap their arms around him. Ben didn't know who had done this but he didn't care he wanted to let go and miss his family. He then smelled a perfume which took him back to a time when things were not so bad for him, and looked up to see it was Adrian holding him from behind crying for him.


	4. Chapter 4

THIS IS HOW THE EVENTS AT THE CEMETERY BETWEEN BEN & ADRIAN WOULD HAVE UNFOLDED.

Ben: Let me go Adrian, why are you even here. (he shakes free from her and gets up from the graves.)  
Adrian: I'm here because she was my daughter too. And I know you needed me. And I need you.  
Ben: I don't need you now Adrian. I'm fine.  
Adrian: If you're fine then why are you here crying in the cemetery on the day of her death, all by yourself. Instead of celebrating at your sister's wedding.  
Ben: Because she needs me to be here (points at Mercy's Grave). Because no one else does what I have to do for her. Because unlike you I remember that she existed, and I was her father.  
Adrian: And I was her mother, and there is not one day that goes by that I don't miss her or think of her or wonder about what type of person she would be if she had lived. You aren't the only one who misses her Ben. You're just the only one that continuously punishes yourself for her death.  
Ben: Maybe, but that is how I deal with it. So leave me alone.

Adrian: You don't have to deal with it alone Ben. I'm here for you if you would just let me be there for you. We would all be there for you if you would just let us help you. (still crying for him)

Ben: You had the opportunity to be there for me. Instead you chose to be with Ricky, then Omar, then my best friend. Then Omar again. I learned to stop needing you, and everyone else, because none of you cared. In turn I learned that I didn't need anyone. I can stand on my own without you, without Amy, or Ricky. Henry, Alice, my mom, my dad, or Mercy. Because all needing people has done for me is let me realize none of you can help me. ONLY I CAN HELP ME.

Adrian: I'm not going to lie Ben you're right. I wasn't there for you when you needed me. You were there for me for months while I grieved for Mercy, and I wasn't there for you. I never thought of how much pain you must have been feeling, or how hard it must have been to be there for me. I should have realized that when you yelled at me in the nursery, you hadn't grieved at all. But I thought the best way to get rid of that pain was to replace it. Then when I saw you weren't ready to deal with it, I just decided to replace you. I'm sorry. That is all I can say.

Ben: Well, you said it, and you're forgiven. So you can go back to the wedding and fix your relationship with Omar, or whoever.

Adrian: I don't want Omar, Ben. I don't want Ricky, or Henry or anyone else. I want you. I wanted you the day you sat in my car with Amy and she took her hand away from yours because she was embarrassed, by that. I wanted you when hugged me in the hallway after Jack blamed me for Grace's dad dying. I wanted you that night I slept with you after I saw how Amy hurt you when she told you about the kiss with Ricky.

Ben: Well, you had me, and then you realized that I wasn't the one, and you divorced me, and found everyone else. So lets just leave it at that.

Adrian: DON'T! Don't you dare do that. You were just as guilty as I was, and don't try and make it like it was all my fault. You wanted me in the car that night too. Or you would have never slept with me. You slept with Alice to get back at Henry for sleeping with me because you felt angry for me, and you know it.

Ben: I was a kid Adrian I did a lot of stupid things that I shouldn't have done. Like dating a girl pregnant by the school gigolo. Asking this girl to marry me, and she didn't even love me. Sleeping with you, and you only loved Ricky. Getting you pregnant and marrying you. Letting girls smoke marijuana in my room, humiliating me in front of my dad. Dating a girl who only liked the trouble she could get into with me. Disappointing my dad over and over and over again. Believing that Henry and Alice were ever really my friends. Or worst of all believing I would ever be allowed to be a father to any child when I am more screwed up than Ricky, you, Chloe, or anyone else will ever be.

Adrian: Don't say that Ben. Don't say anything that you did was a mistake because it wasn't. If it wasn't for you John wouldn't be alive right now, because you gave Amy the confidence to keep him, and realize she was stronger than she knew. Ricky would never have become the man he is today if it weren't for his friendship with you. Henry and Alice cherished their friendship with you it killed them to realize how much they hurt you. They named their first born son after you because they felt they owed you that much. Chloe, your dad both of them said they owed so much to you for being there for them when it mattered. Like after your mom died. Your dad said you were the reason he was able to get through that because you reminded him everyday that your mom still lived through you. You gave him purpose again.

Chloe told me that if she had not met you, and your dad she would have never known what to look for in a man, and that is why she got married because her husband Adam has every bit of the attributes you and Leo share. I owe you everything, Benny. You taught me what real love truly was, and that I am more than just my body, or my looks. You made me proud to be who I am without shame.

Ben: Well that's great Adrian. I helped all of you now you can all live your happily ever after and let me live mine.

Adrian: Ben your life is no happily ever after, and you know it.

Ben: Why isn't it? I have control over my Dad's now billion dollar corporation. I even own my own million dollar magazine. I can go anywhere in the world I want, and I am recognized world over. I help kids all around the world, and I am even up for winning a Humanitarian, and Man of the Year award. I'm way more attractive now than I ever was in high school. I can sleep with any woman in the world I want, and I don't have to ever worry about being made the fool of, or making a fool of myself, or falling in love or getting someone pregnant. I don't have to worry about disappointing my dad ever again. I don't have to worry about people betraying me, or hurting me. I AM LIVING MY HAPPILY EVER AFTER ADRIAN!

Adrian: Stop fooling yourself Benny. You know you aren't happy with that life, and I know you aren't because I lived that life, and I was never happy. My mom was never around and no one wanted me around. I had my choice of any man, and I was desired. I could go and do anything, and I was still a straight A student. And we both know that I was empty inside. I didn't realize that until I met you, and knew I wanted more.

Ben: No, you mean until you met Ricky.

Adrian: No, I mean until I met you. Until I saw you. That skinny geek leaning on your locker watching me from across the hall while I flirted with Ricky. I knew you would never have the guts to approach me, so I was more than happy to give Ricky a shot. Because I never thought a kid like you would ever have the balls to approach me. Then one day you did. You came up to me and asked for my help to go see Amy. I said to myself when I was talking to you, This is the guy I would want in my life. A man who would do anything to be there for the woman he loved. I hated seeing you with Amy because I knew she never would appreciate you. I knew it when she was embarrassed for holding your hand, while she was the one pregnant with another man's child.

When I found out I was carrying your baby, you have no idea how confused I was. Out of all the men I have ever slept with, out of all the times I slept with Ricky you were the one who got me pregnant. I didn't know what to do when I found out, and I thought for certain you would just turn me away when I told you. But you didn't. You held me and told me that you would be there for me no matter what. I was the "SCHOOL SLUT" Pregnant by the SCHOOL PRINCE. You could have told me to get an abortion, or just do what any other guy would do and say that it wasn't yours. I wouldn't have even blamed you. But you didn't you were there everyday. You never left my side. You never once questioned me, about being the father. When I went to get the abortion I was scared that I was killing this child because of what I knew I could feel for you. I couldn't go through with it because she was a piece of you, and I could never bring myself to harm or hurt something that came from you. I knew that when I came to your house after arguing with my dad, and you didn't turn me away. You stayed by me and made me believe everything would be okay, and even if it wasn't you would still be there.

I was proud, and happy every time you took your hand in mine and walked down the hallway with me. I would be overcome with joy whenever you told me that you loved me. You were the man I wanted Ricky to be. I wanted Ricky because I thought he was the best I could ever get. Then I had you, and I let you go because I didn't believe you could ever want me after Mercy died. I hurt you to keep you away because all I ever seemed to do was hurt you. That's why I thought my... our daughter died. When you yelled at me in the nursery I hated you for not stepping up and being the prince I always thought you were suppose to be. Then when I realized that I was trying to bring another life into the world to keep you, I didn't want to do it because you weren't the man I needed you to be so I went for Ricky, and I kicked you out of the condo too hurt you again. The night of the party after Ricky and Omar both just left me. There you were again being the prince and coming to my rescue. I hated you when you left to be with Dylan, and I wanted to hurt you so I slept with Henry. You have no idea of the shame I felt when I realized what I did.

Ben: Well you got your wish, and you got your Knight in shining armor with Omar. You married him, what a year after our marriage was done. You, Omar, Amy, Grace, Jack and Ricky could of all had your lovely wedding together. I wasn't around to be the fool anymore, and from what I heard things went smoothly for all of you. Just go back patch things up with Omar, and let me be to my happiness or misery or whatever you think it is. Because I don't need to be anyone's hero or savior anymore Adrian. I'm done wearing a cape, fighting dragons, and rescuing princesses. There is no such thing as a Prince Charming, and I'm done trying to be one. I never wanted to be the "Sausage Prince" and it is obvious Ricky is much better at it than me.

Adrian: I don't want you to save me Ben. I want to save you. No one was there to rescue you from your pain, that's why I'm here now. (Touching his face and rubbing, which reminds him of the night she woke up and lost Mercy).

Ben: Sorry Adrian, (taking her hand away) I don't need saving anymore. I saved myself. So I don't need rescuing specifically from you.

Adrian: That won't mean, I will stop trying Benny.

Ben: You should, because it's useless. I never loved you anyway. I love Amy. It was always Amy. I only used you that night to get back at her and Ricky.

Adrian: (Shedding tears for herself) Maybe, but it doesn't stop me from loving you Ben. It also wont stop me from trying to be there for you. Because I love you, and I owe it you and to our daughter...

Ben: Well you should. Because chances of you and I being together is just like our daughter. Dead and Gone.

**Authors Note: **There will be a fifth final wrap up coming. Just had to put this piece in. I had broken pieces of it, and it took me time to put them together. But the rest will be up later, and so will the final chapter of **"YOU FOUND ME"** as well as the final 7 Chapters of** "BEN BOYKEWICH"** and stay tuned for **"MR. NEWMAN"**.


	5. Chapter 5

_**PREFASE:**_

It has been over a month since I last updated and I apologize. With this last section I will tie up loose ends. In what would have been three chapters is now summarized. Ben has become even more withdrawn with the company being able to stand on its own, so he decides on whether or not he should make it a publicly traded company placing the control into a more seasoned member of the board. This angers Ricky who still believes that he should be the one in charge of the company.

_Adrian still hasn't given up on Ben and relays what happened between them to Clementine who is shocked at Ben's actions, and his declaration about Amy. It is also a shock to Tess, who knows Ben better than most, but refuses to reveal his secrets to anyone since he trusted them to her. Ricky and Amy are arguing because it is discovered that he had an affair on a business trip and the woman he slept with may have had his child. This news comes as a shock to everyone specifically Ricky. It is also discovered y Clementine that Ben found out about the affair, and tried to cover it up, by paying the young woman Victoria $250,000.00 but she was greedy and asked for more or else._

Clementine: Ben, I don't understand you how could you pay this woman off? Don't you have any integrity?

Ben: Clementine, what are you getting mad at me for. I was only trying to help.

Clementine: That's what I can't figure Ben who were you trying to help? Ricky is not one of your biggest fans, and I know that goes the same for you. So why on earth would you try and protect him. He has never done anything for you at all, and yet here you are covering for him. This could ruin his marriage to Amy and let you come in and take her. I mean isn't that what you wanted, another chance with Amy.

Ben: Amy, why on earth would you think I wanted Amy Clementine.

Clementine: Because that is what you told to Adrian, when she followed you to the grave yard after Chloe's wedding.

Ben: Its been ten years, and like always no one in this town can keep a secret. (Ben scoffs)

Clementine: Ben, if that is not the case then why did you turn Adrian away like that and profess your love for Amy, only to try and hide Ricky's dark secret about his other child, and the affair he had. This makes no sense.

Ben: Well, since you obviously won't let this go and you are my other assistant I might as well give tell you so you can drop this whole mess, and concentrate on work. (Ben then opens a desk drawer, and takes out an album. He holds it for a moment, then passes it to Clementine) This is the truth Clementine. This is only suppose to be between you and me. I don't want what I show and tell you to leave this office.

Clementine: Ben if what I have talked about with everyone was so private. I should have been more sensitive, and respectful of your life, and your feelings I'm sorry. You don't have to show or tell me anything. You don't owe me an explanation, or anything else. I owe you for this job, and this opportunity. You're my boss, and I'm your employee. I should have never overstepped my boundaries as your assistant. Please forgive me.

Ben: Clementine its alright, and understandable. You are more than my assistant you're my friend. You are also one of the few people in this world who I know I can depend on and trust. So please just look at this and let me explain.

Clementine: Okay, if you wish. (She takes the binder and looks at the cover which is in a beautiful design pattern with a picture of Adrian, Ben, Ricky, Jack, Ashley, Amy, Lauren, Madison, and John on the front. Inside she sees pages, and mementos through out the pages. Alson in them she discovers notes and pages of what looks like a journal inside beside each memento.) Ben what is this?

Ben: That is my journal. it details everything about me, my life, and the people in it. When I was a kid, my mom gave this notebook, and told me to put down all of my dreams, fears, thoughts, doubts, memories, and worries into that book. When ever I have problems, or I face a challenge or I just experience something new in my life I write it down, and place mementos of my life into that book. My mom gave it to me because she said that it would serve as a guide to my children, so if anything ever happened to me they would be able to read it, and understand who I was. That way they would know I wasn't perfect, that I had my flaws, I made mistakes, and so they could learn from them. I never really understood why my mother did that, until I my dad told me how my mom, and my grandparents were all alcoholics. I always pictured my mom as perfect, and even though it was hard for me to take in, it allowed me to become closer to her.

I used this journal at first to keep my mom close to me, and let her know what my life was like, and how I was doing. It was the only way I felt I could be close to her. When I was with Amy I stopped writing in my journal when I found out she was pregnant with Ricky's child. I did that because I felt ashamed because I knew Amy was only with me because of my family's money.

Clementine: Ben, I'm sure it was more to her interest in you than your family's money.

Ben: No, Clementine it wasn't. I wish everyday that there was, but it wasn't. I knew it wasn't because of how Amy treated me through out our relationship. Amy grew to care about me, but she never loved me. If she had she would have put in just as much effort into our relationship as I did.

Clementine: So, what does your journal have to do with all this.

Ben: My journal held all the secrets about myself from myself. Whenever I felt bad, or knew that I was being used I would write it down. That way I could keep the secret about what I really knew about people from myself. My journal Clementine is probably my best friend in the world. I can tell it any secret, and it would keep them. It holds the truth about everyone in my life, and all my mistakes, its also the thing that made me start writing. there are secrets in there about myself that I don't even remember existed. That is how I was able to deal with my life Clementine. Its how I was able to be in a relationship with Amy despite the fact she didn't love me, and she was pregnant with another man's child. Its how I was able to be there beside Adrian, and marry her. Then able to stay by her side when our child died. Its how I was able to withstand losing her, and our marriage. It helped me cope with realizing that Henry, Alice, and I weren't really friends. Its how I dealt with being stuck as the loser compared to Ricky. Its how I dealt with the disappointment my dad had for me. Read this, and then you will understand more about me than any person in the world, myself included (smiling). Then give it back to me. Never ask me about anything you've read, or what secret you have uncovered because not even I read my journal. This journal is my secret life, and I want it to stay that way secret even to me. You are only one in three people that have ever read it, so think yourself lucky.

Clementine: Who were the other two, if I'm the third?

Ben: Chloe was the first, and Tess was the last.

**PROFASE:**

Clementine then takes the journal home with her where she reads it for six days. Each day she would return to work only to look at Ben, and wonder, about some item she had read in the journal. Ben would notice her stares, but disregard them and not worry about what secret she had uncovered about him. What Clementine discovered about Ben, made her cry in many sections of the journal. She thought that what she and Ricky endured growing up as orphans was difficult, but Ben's life was no different in some instances she understood how it was worse. Ben dealt with bullies for years of his life, and he would hide his beatings, from his father, and friends. He was ridiculed throughout his high school life the moment everyone found out Amy was pregnant. Ben would spend a lot of time unknown to his friends family, and even Amy hiding the graffiti being written about him, Amy, and even Ricky. He even paid people to not spread rumors about all of them.

His relationship with Adrian was no different, he even paid some people to go to Adrian's baby shower unknown to Amy, and Grace. When he and Adrian broke up, and she was living with Omar the rumors about Ben and his life got worse, however Ben didn't stop these rumors. She was near tears when she realized Ben spent his senior year in high school in total shame. What shocked her was Ben even paid to keep the secret of Ricky cheating in school from ever being realized when he paid Joe Hampton $1,000.00 to never tell that he wrote all of Ricky's papers his Freshmen year. It amazed her how he could do so much for all of these people, and no one Henry, Alice, Adrian, Jack, Ricky, Amy, or even his own father realized what he was dealing with on a daily basis for all of them. Ben was ridiculed primarily because it seemed as everyone was rewarded by his dad for hurting his son. Ben loved Leo so much he didn't have the heart to tell his own father he hated him, and he had every right to hate him. In Leo's attempt to do good for others it did harm to his own son. Leo never thought that paying for Ricky after Amy and he started dating would make Ben look like a loser to everyone. Adrian was no different by dumping Ben and going after Ricky, sleeping with Henry, and living with Omar she made him a resident joke. Amy was just as bad if not worse, but Ben kept all the rumors and ridicule against them at bay and suffered for them on his own.

When she got to the part about the affair Ricky had with Victoria, she learned that Victoria had left a message for Ricky that accidentally got sent to Ben. When this happened he swore not to let John the young boy whom Ben felt was the closest thing he would ever be allowed to having a child be hurt. So Ben paid Victoria's blackmail on Ricky's behalf, however when she learned who Ben was she wanted more, and went to Ricky directly when Ben refused to pay. When Clementine finished reading the journal she cried for him. When Clementine went back to work the next week she returned the journal. She placed it on his desk and looked him in the eye. What she saw nearly broke her heart, she saw then Ben's stone glare that allowed him to deal with his life, but after reading his journal she realized the stoney glare held back his sadness, his anger, and his pain. She now understood why Ricky and Ben could never like one another it was because they were exactly the same. The difference was Ben was his own enemy, he made himself suffer the way Bob made Ricky suffer. But Ricky unlike Ben found a light into his dark life that was given to him by everyone that he loved, Amy, Adrian, his parents, John, and Leo. Ben on the other hand was driven into the darkness by everyone he loved. Amy, Adrian, Henry, Alice, Ricky, and Leo. They were both two sides of the same coin.

Clementine: Ben...

Ben: Yes, Clementine? (giving her that stone glare and forcing her to remember his words...(_Read this, and then you will understand more about me than any person in the world, myself included. Then give it back to me. Never ask me about anything you've read, or what secret you have uncovered because not even I read my journal. This journal is my secret life, and I want it to stay that way secret even to me.)_

Clementine: Would you like some coffee? (She decided that if this is how Ben wished to live his life in order to cope she should not interfere, because she had no right.)

Ben: Yes, I would love a cup of coffee.(smiling knowing that she would keep his secret.)

**_I need another story_**  
**_ Something to get off my chest_**  
**_ My life gets kinda boring_**  
**_ Need something that I can confess_**

**_'Til all my sleeves are stained red_**  
**_ From all the truth that I've said_**  
**_ Come by it honestly I swear_**  
**_ Thought you saw me wink, no_**  
**_ I've been on the brink, so_**

**_Tell me what you want to hear_**  
**_ Something that were like those years_**  
**_ I'm sick of all the insincere_**  
**_ So I'm gonna give all my secrets away_**

**_This time_**  
**_ Don't need another perfect line_**  
**_ Don't care if critics ever jump in line_**  
**_ I'm gonna give all my secrets away_**

**_My God_**  
**_ Amazing that we got this far_**  
**_ It's like we're chasing all those stars_**  
**_ Who's driving shiny big black cars_**

**_And everyday I see the news, all the problems that we could solve_**  
**_ And when a situation rises, just write it into an album_**  
**_ Seen it straight to go_**  
**_ I don't really like my flow, no, so_**

**_Tell me what you want to hear_**  
**_ Something that were like those years_**  
**_ I'm sick of all the insincere_**  
**_ So I'm gonna give all my secrets away_**

**_This time_**  
**_ Don't need another perfect line_**  
**_ Don't care if critics ever jump in line_**  
**_ I'm gonna give all my secrets away_**

**_Oh, got no reason, got not shame_**  
**_ Got no family I can blame_**  
**_ Just don't let me disappear_**  
**_ I'm a tell you everything_**

**_So tell me what you want to hear_**  
**_ Something that were like those years_**  
**_ I'm sick of all the insincere_**  
**_ So I'm gonna give all my secrets away_**

**_This time_**  
**_ Don't need another perfect line_**  
**_ Don't care if critics ever jump in line_**  
**_ I'm gonna give all my secrets away_**

**_So tell me what you want to hear_**  
**_ Something that were like those years_**  
**_ Sick of all the insincere_**  
**_ So I'm gonna give all my secrets away_**

**_This time_**  
**_ Don't need another perfect line_**  
**_ Don't care if critics ever jump in line_**  
**_ I'm gonna give all my secrets away_**

**_All my secrets away_**  
**_ All my secrets away_**

**AUTHORS NOTE**: Later it was discovered that Victoria's son Victor is not Ricky's son, she paid someone to alter the lab results, this ends Ricky's frustration with her but not with Amy. In my next update Ben will have a conversation with Amy. It will also have an argument between Ricky and Amy. It will then return to an argument between Ben and Ricky.


	6. Chapter 6

**In_ this section we will view the argument between Ricky and Amy after discovering the baby was not Ricky's. Ricky is no longer living with Amy, after discovering that he cheated on her, and possibly fathered another child Amy throws Ricky out in a very dramatic Amy scene, where she threw all of his things out of a window yelling at him in front of their children and the neighbors. John is now thirteen, and is embarrassed by all of these events. His brother is only four, and cannot really understand what is happening. We will also see a scene between Ben and Amy, and the aftermath that followed._**

Ricky: I don't get it Amy, why are you still mad at me? The baby wasn't mine. (Ricky still upset)

Amy: It doesn't matter if the baby was yours or not Ricky. You cheated on me. After being married for almost ten years you cheat cheat on me with some skank. I'm your wife, and the mother of your children and after all that we've been through you do this to me.

Ricky: Amy it wasn't my fault, I was at the bar and she came on to me. I had a little too much to drink, and it just happened. I didn't mean to do it. But, you, and I were having problems, and Leo and I had our falling out. I just couldn't help myself.

Amy: Don't you dare try and blame this shit on me, or on Leo. "God rest his soul". This is on you Ricky Underwood. You and your Goddamn dick, that can't stay dry.

Ricky: Amy, I never meant for this too happen, I thought I was careful, I knew the baby wasn't mine.

Amy: What do you mean by "Careful, Ricky"?

Ricky: You know, careful I thought, NO I know for certain that I wore a condom.

Amy: So, you were drunk yet you weren't drunk enough to forget to wear a condom? Which is it Ricky?

Ricky: Amy, that's not what I mean.

Amy: Then what did you mean. Dear God, please don't tell me you planned to cheat on me.

Ricky: Amy...

Amy: You did, didn't you? Have you done this every time you've gone on a trip? Answer me Ricky, truthfully. Was this your first time cheating on me or was this just the first time that you've been caught. (Amy asked fearing the answer.)

Ricky: (hesitates, but tells the truth) It only happened two other times Amy, and neither of those women meant anything to me. (places hands on her shoulders)

Amy: You selfish, dirty "SON OF BITCH"! (begins punching him in the chest, and crying) How could you do this to me, to our family. I sacrificed everything for you, and you still do this. I gave up my sister, my life, even the first man I ever loved for you, and this is how you repay me. I have been nothing, but loyal to you, and you still do this.

Ricky: Amy don't go and act like that you did any of that for me. You were the one who decided to move in with me, because you wanted to be closer. Ashley didn't move away from here because of me, she did it because of you. I never once stopped you from calling her so don't try and pretend that what happened between you two is my fault. As for Ben, that's on you. You knew fully well, he put you in the same position that you put him in back when you two first met. But when the shoe was on the other foot, it was too big for you to fill, so you ran.

Amy: Really, because you were the one who came to see me in New York.

Ricky: What can I say Amy, I'm an opportunist. I knew that you could never live with Adrian having a child with Ben, and I went for it. But you were the one who chose to leave him, for me.

Amy: That was the biggest mistake of my life, because he is more of a man than you ever were. (Angry, upset, and crying,)

Ricky: Well, I must have been some type of man because both you and Adrian seemed to enjoy it so much, neither of you wanted Ben in the end.

Amy: You know what Ricky, all these years I thought you had changed, but you haven't done anything. Underneath it all you are still the same, selfish, egotistical, conceited jerk you were back when I was a kid.

Ricky: And you are still the same, stuck up, spoiled little brat of a princess, that I tricked into sleeping with me too. (angry)

Amy: Get Out! Get Out! I never want to see you again.

Ricky: I'll leave, but that still doesn't change the fact that we are married, or that we have kids together. Or have you forgotten that I'm the one who supports this family, and you don't have a job any longer. So you need me more than I need you, or the crap I have to go through.

Amy: You know Ricky I see why I thought I could love you, because you're a con. You conned your way into taking my virginity, and making me believe that you had changed. You conned everyone, me, Adrian, my parents, your parent's, Grace, Jack, and even Leo. But, you never could con Ben. He saw right through your tricks, and that is why you hate him so much.

Ricky: No I hate Ben, because he's a little jerk that thinks he should have it all, because he's rich.

Amy: No, its because he's Leo's son, and you're envious of him because of that. Because he's the man you will never be. Ben never conned me, or Adrian into loving him. He's there when ever we need him, just like his dad. And you, You're just going to be Bob Underwood's son.

Ricky: (Balls up his fist and raises his hand to strike Amy. But, she covers herself in fear. Ricky withdraws shocked at himself for what he's said, and what he was about to do.) I'm sorry Amy I never, I don't know what came over me. (He looks around and see's his son John looking at him from the stairs, and turns to leave. He is in total shame of what he did, and what he's become. Leaves, with tears forming and drives away.)

**THIS NEXT SECTIONS TAKES PLACE A FEW DAYS LATER. RICKY HAS TAKEN SOLACE IN THESE EVENTS BY GOING TO VISIT HIS PARENTS SHAKUR & MARGARET. AMY GOES TO SEE ADRIAN WHO INFORMS HER OF WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN SHE AND BEN. AMY DECIDES NOT TO TELL ADRIAN WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN SHE AND RICKY. ADRIAN ALSO TELLS AMY THAT SHE DOESN'T WANT TO GET BACK WITH OMAR, THAT EVEN THOUGH SHE AND BEN ARE SO FAR APART, SHE WON'T GIVE UP ON HIM. AMY DECIDES THAT SHE ALSO WANTS TO BE WITH BEN, SO SHE MAKES PLANS TO Get HIM BEFORE ADRIAN. SHE THEN SENDS HER BOYS TO VISIT GEORGE.**

**SHE PUTS ON A SEXY RED DRESS WITH A BLACK LACE LINGERIE, & VISITS BEN THAT NIGHT. SHE KNOWS SHE IS BEING UNDERHANDED BETRAYING ADRIAN, BUT SHE IS ANGRY & DOESN'T CARE. SHE SHOWS UP AT BEN'S APARTMENT. BEN WORKS OUT TWICE A DAY FOR THREE HOURS. ONE HOUR JOGGING, ONE HOUR CARDIO, ONE HOUR WEIGHT LIFTING. HE ALSO TAKES A HOST OF VITAMINS & DRUGS TO STAY HEALTHY FOR HIS CROHNS DISEASE MAINLY BECAUSE HE HAS NOT HAD HIS OPERATION YET. THE MEDICATION IMPROVES HIS IMMUNE SYSTEM, & HIS DIGESTIVE TRACK. HE ALSO EATS A WELL BALANCED MEAL MOSTLY WITH MUSCLE AND VITAMIN D. HE HAS GAINED 40 LBS MAKING HIM 165 LBS. HIS MUSCLES, ARE THAT OF RICKY'S IN HIGH SCHOOL. BUT BEN ALSO HAS TATTOOS. AN INFINITY SYMBOL ON HIS LEFT ARM. A CELTIC CROSS ON HIS RIGHT SHOULDER THE NAMES OF EVERYONE HE LOVES ARE WRITTEN INSIDE. HE ALSO HAS A POEM WRITTEN ON HIS LEFT AB MUSCLE IN ITALIAN. HE ALSO HAS A BABY ANGEL OR CHERUB TATTOO ON HIS HEART.**

**(KNOCKING ON APARTMENT DOOR. BEN WEARING A BLACK SLEEVELESS NIKE OUTFIT CLINGING TO HIS SWEATY FORM.)**

Ben: Coming... (Irritated to be summoned this late when he wanted to shower and sleep. Shocked when he see's Amy.)

Amy: Hi, Ben long time no see. (Shocked to see Ben looking so...different and hot.)

Ben: (Looking stunned to see Amy at his door so late, even more to see her looking the way she is.) Amy...

Amy: So are you going to let me in, or do you want me to freeze to death out here.

Ben: (Returns to his senses, and invites her in.) Yes, Yes...Come in. Is everything alright, or has something happened.

Amy: Yes, something has happened, but nothing bad has happened I think something right has finally happened. (She looks at him very seductively similar to the way Adrian looks.) So are you going to offer me a drink or do I have to stay here and get cotton mouth.

Ben: Yeah, what can I get you?

Amy: What do you have red or white wine. (She takes a seat on his sofa, and lets him know she is looking at his body with her eyes. She also lets him know she is flirting, by letting the strap on her dress come down.

Ben: I don't drink Amy. Ever since that video of me passing out at Geoff's, I stay clean. I have orange juice, and spring water.

Amy: Water will be fine. (Ben hands her a water bottle and takes a seat on a stool beside his kitchen counter.

Ben: Amy why are you here this late at night? More importantly, where is your family? (Realizing Amy's intention.)

Amy: My boys are with my dad and Kathleen. I thought they needed to have a break from the drama going on between Ricky and I. As for Ricky, I really don't give a fuck where that bastard is right now. I hope he's in hell, or catching a VD from some whore. (She gets up and joins him at the counter)

Ben: Amy you don't mean that, he's your husband, and the father of your children.

Amy: Yes, he is. But, I don't want to talk about that right now. Right now, I want to talk about how you are doing and coping. We never did get a chance to talk after your dad's funeral. I wanted to talk to you before, but I really didn't know what to say. I mean, your dad never really did like me. He thought I ruined your life, and your relationship with him. Honestly he may have been right. But, now I want to make up for all of that.

Ben: Amy lets not do this. There was a lot reason's that went into my leaving, you were only one of several. But, right now you don't want to do this.

Amy: Do what, Ben? Do what you have been dreaming about since the day you and I first met. (Gets out of her seat and stands in front of him.) Ben, I know that you still have feelings for me. I still have feelings for you too. You were there for me through so much, but I was selfish and stupid. I was an ignorant kid, and so were you. We both made mistakes, but now we have the opportunity to be together, and I don't want to ruin that. She steps forward to get closer to him inches from his face.

Ben: (Likes this feeling of being close to Amy. He feels the heat, and tension coming from her body. He sees, how hot she is staring at him. He notices her dress, and how soft it must feel. But then he notices something that gives him back his moral strength. He whiffs the intoxicating aroma of a perfume that undoubtedly belongs to Adrian.) Amy we shouldn't do this, he says as Amy's head is micrometers from his and this lips are so close that she can breathe in every word he says.

Amy: Yes, we can Ben. Nothing is holding us back now. I know Ricky and I were a mistake. Just like you knew, you and Adrian were a mistake when your baby died. (It was then she feels Ben's hands on her arms, she thinks he is pulling her in to kiss, but she is pushed away.)

Ben: Don't say that Amy. Don't ever say that Adrian and I being together is what caused our daughter to die. (He looks angry and sad at this.)

Amy: Ben, I'm sorry if that upset you. Let me make it up to you. (She tries again to approach him, but he has all of his wits about him.)

Ben: Amy, I made this mistake twelve years ago, and I'm not gonna make an even bigger one now. You and I are over. I am no longer that same stupid kid that believed that my love for you would be enough to keep you. Because honestly you were never the woman I loved.

Amy" Ben, how can you say that, after everything we went through together, and meant to one another? (Shocked at Ben's rejection)

Ben: Because of how you are acting right now Amy, and because of how things turned out. When we were together Amy I thought you were sweet, innocent, and so pure. I always imagined that you were this princess that needed me to save her from the darkness of the world. But that image I had of you was a lie. I was living in a fantasy world, and you were never that princess.

Amy: Ben, I know that I hurt you, but I always loved you, and appreciated you for everything you did for me.

Ben: Amy, you may have appreciated me for what I did for you, but you never loved me. If you loved me Amy, none of what happened between us would have taken place.

Amy: Ben, we would still be together if you wouldn't have slept with Adrian. I just couldn't be with you knowing that you were having a baby with that slut...

Ben: (shocked at how Amy could be so cruel to Adrian, after claiming they were friends) Amy, how could you say that about Adrian and you are supposed to be friends.

Amy: We are Ben. but I can never forgive her for taking advantage of you like that. Then she breaks your heart and ends your marriage to go after Ricky, and then tries to start a family with Omar in the home that you two were suppose to share. What kind of person does that. (She scoffs, and does her Amy face.)

Ben: I can think of someone, you. Amy you spent nearly two years saying you loved me, then treated me like crap, after John was born. When you found out Adrian was pregnant, you kicked me to the curb to be with Ricky after telling me for months you had no feelings for him. Then you sleep with him after all of your decorations of love for me, right after my daughter died. You moved in with him and slept in the bed, and home, where my entire family got there start in America. Now look at you. You are here standing in a very sexy outfit trying to seduce me, to get back at Rick for cheating on you. Are you really different now Amy from how Adrian was then, or are you still the same person now, you were then?

Amy: But, that was just because I was like you Ben I was angry, hurt, and confused.

Ben: Amy we were teenagers, we were all angry, hurt, and confused. But we all had to take responsibility for our actions. Adrian didn't have to try to seduce me. I wanted her too Amy. Probably even more than I wanted you. Yes our marriage was a mistake, but our daughter was not. I hated how she was conceived, but the only reason I regret that night was because I felt that I betrayed you and Ricky to do it. But, truthfully, it was because I never wanted to admit, I didn't feel as much for you as I thought. Amy look at you.

Amy: Ben, how can you say that. We loved each other.

Ben: Did we Amy? Did we love each other, or did we just need each other. I cared about you Amy, but I was never happy with you. You needed me because of the situation you were in, and I needed you because I just wanted to feel important. I wanted to feel like I was worth more than my Dad, and his money. You did make me feel that Amy, but you never made me feel love, happy, or that I could trust you.

Amy: If that is how you feel Ben, then why did you tell Adrian you still loved me.

Ben: Because, I didn't want to admit to myself or to her, that I missed her. I wanted to keep the pain I have from losing her, and our child. Because this pain inside me, makes me strong. It makes me independent, and it makes me feel invulnerable. The only time I have ever felt like that, was when I was with Adrian Amy, and when I stopped being with her I felt lower than I have ever been.

Amy: And what about when you were with me, Ben? What did I make you feel? (Feelings sad that Ben may not have loved her)

Ben: You made me feel important Amy, but you never made me feel that I could trust you. You said that you loved me, but refused to tell me that you were pregnant. No matter what I did Amy, it never felt that I could do enough. It always seemed that you were using me to challenge Ricky. I wanted to be with you and your baby Amy. Not with you, the baby, and Ricky.

Amy: Ben, Adrian tried to lie to you about being pregnant, how could you have liked being with her.

Ben: Because, she lied to protect me. She never made me feel that I had to be there for her, but she did make me feel loved. No matter how I tried to ignore it you made me feel used. I guess Ashley was right. "I can feel everything, but the truth."

Amy: Ashley how did Ashley come into this Ben, you and she weren't even friends, and she never liked you.

Ben: I never liked her either, she said it was because we were so much alike. She came into it after, Mercy died. She would call to check up on Adrian and I. Then she would call to check up on me, since Adrian refused to talk to her. Then she would call just to check up on me, since she felt sorry for how we both ended up the loser. After a while we would just talk about how both our lives got screwed up trying to help other people. So we decided that we would both try and help ourselves. She thought that leaving would be better. I thought staying would, and man was I wrong. But, when she called for a favor one day I still helped her out. I sometimes tease her about the irony.

Amy: Ben, how did you ever help Ashley. You could never do anything for her.

Ben: Amy, how do you think Ashley got into culinary school. Ashely never had any proper training in the kitchen, nor did she have a home economics course. She never worked in the food industry once. Ashley called me, and I used my father, and my uncle's names and connections to get Ashley accepted. She was in Italy Amy, you should've known I or my dad had to play a part in her acceptance.

Amy: So you've talked to Ashley, how is she? (Amy sounding very sad not to have spoken to her sister in ten years)

Ben: She's fine, and she's also married and about to become a mom.

Amy: WHAT! Ashley is married, and pregnant? Who is she married to, when did they get married.

Ben: Hold on. (Leaves takes out his IPAD and shows her holographic images of Ashley in a beautiful white wedding dress with veil. Her hair was down wearing red lip sticky and only eye liner. She is dancing with Ben, and others at her wedding. Ben shows Ashley a holo image of Ashley actually crying as she stands next to a man tall with blond hair saying his vows to her.) This is Ashley and her husband Matthew Harding. He is the new owner of my uncle's hotel. When he took over he tried to have Gordon Ramsey come in and take over the kitchen. Ashley worked there, and when Ramsey insulted her lasagna dish, she actually made him cry and quit. When that happened he and Ashley had to work together to make the hotel work. They worked so closely they fell in love.

Amy: Who was her matron of honor? (Amy was sad, that she never got Ashley to come to her wedding. She always thought that when she and her sister got married they would be the others matron of honor.

Ben: Take a look. (Shows her a picture of Ashley and he standing side by side.) Ashley was unorthodox she had me do two jobs, be her Man of Honor, and be give her away.

Amy: You gave Ashley away,Ben. My dad is going to kill you if he ever finds out. (She takes the ipad and looks through the pictures and see's how happy Ashley is, and how handsome her husband looks. She is mesmerized at how lovingly he looks at Ash. She continues to look through the pictures, until she see's a message marked for Ben and Plays it.)

Ashley: Hey Ben or should I say "HELLO GOD FATHER" she speaks to Ben in her GODFATHER VOICE. I've got three on the way, and you are officially the babysitter. I want you to know that one is going to be a boy and if you don't mind we are going to name him after you uncle, since you don't seem to want to have any kids. We are even thinking of giving one of them to you to alleviate our stress of caring for them. I'm hoping you are doing well, and that you haven't been avoiding my messages on purpose. I really hope you aren't letting my sister, and all of her bullshit drama affect you. You have come too far to go back Ben. Hurry up, and get your stomach fixed so you can get here. I'm going to pop in five months, so get your bony ass here Sausage Prince.

Amy: (Cuts off the message, and starts to cry that Ben of all people has a better relationship with her sister than she does.) How did this happen Ben, how did I go from being best friends and trusting Ashley with everything to this.

Ben: I don't know Amy, how did I go from being the guy that was obsessed with you, to being Ashley's best friend, and a toned down version of Ricky.

Amy: How do we get back to that place we were when our lives made sense? (she leans beside them as they sit on his counter.

Ben: I don't think we can. I think we can only try and rebuild a bridge back to where we are. I learned a long time ago you can never go back. You can only move forward and hope somewhere ahead of you is a bright light.

Amy: I hope there is a bright light for this road we're on Ben. I hope we can get to a bright light.

Ben: If we have any luck Amy there will be.

Amy: Thank you Ben, and thanks for showing me that this would have been a really big mistake.

Ben: Well, part of me doesn't know whether I should be offended by that, or flattered.

Amy: You should definitely be flattered by it. (She hugs Ben, and then looks deeply into his eyes.) I'm sorry Ben, I have to know. (She then pulls him toward her, and kisses him passionately)

Ben: (Ben hesitates at first then gives in to the kiss.) Nothing, what about you?

Amy: Nothing, really? (Shocked, she really really liked that kiss, it turned her on.)

Ben: I don't know Amy, I guess all the build up just wasn't enough, but I have kissed a lot of women since you, so.

Amy: Hey, I broke Ricky Underwood and I was your first kiss, and I can break you. (kisses him again)

Ben: Nothing. I guess we weren't really meant to be.

Amy: I guess not, but if we would have gone through with this. I would have rocked your world.

Ben: Goodbye Amy, but I think the only person who can rock my world is Adrian.

Amy: Then you should tell her. I just wish I knew what I was going to do. I love Ricky, but I really don't know how we are going to get through this.

Ben: Whatever you decide to do Amy, I will be there for you. As a friend. (rubs her back)

Amy: You always are there when we need you aren't you Ben. I hope one day we can return the favor.

Ben: I'll try to be here when you do. (Walks her to the door.)

Amy: (As the door opens she grabs Ben and kisses him again even more passionately.) Still nothing.

Ben: Nothing. (closes the door.) I need a cold shower. (Takes off his outfit revealing he got an erection from the last kiss.)

_**UNKNOWN TO BEN & AMY RICKY WAS SPYING ON AMY. HE DRIVES AWAY ANGRILY AS HE SEES AMY KISS BEN AND LEAVE.**_


	7. Chapter 7

**Ben returns to the office the next day and decides that he needs to follow Amy's advice and tell Adrian the truth about how he really feels about her. He takes out his journal and wraps it in a small package, and then asks Clementine to order 10 red roses. One for each year he was away, and to commemorate the anniversary of their wedding, and Mercy's passing. As he sits in his office, contemplating whether or not what he is about to do is a good idea, Ricky barges into his office angrier than anything he has ever been._  
_**

Ricky: So how does it feel Ben to ruin a marriage that has been through hell, and is almost ten years old. Does it finally make you feel good to know that you ruined my life the way I ruined yours. (angry, crying, and wearing a wrinkled gray suit.)

Ben: Ricky! What the hell are you talking about, and why the fuck are you in my office? (angry, and shocked to see Ricky like this, and naive to what Ricky is complaining about.)

Ricky: You know exactly why I'm here Ben. You slept with my wife last night. I saw you two together, and don't you dare deny it! (mad, and upset)

Clementine: (Rushes In worried about both Ben and Ricky) Ricky, what are you doing in here you should leave before I have to call security.

Ricky: Not until this asshole admits that he fucked Amy, like the jerk he is. Did it feel nice Ben to finally fuck her. I know that's what you always wanted to do. You didn't stop until you fucked Adrian and got her pregnant, did you get Amy pregnant too? (screaming, and angry. face turning red)

Clementine: Ricky what are you talking about, Ben would never do that. Would you Ben? (turns to look at Ben who seems to be annoyed yet looks guilty at what Ricky has said. Then he gets up from his desk and looks at Ricky with a face that resembled the old Ricky)

Ben: If I did Ricky, then its no worse than anything you have done. We just did to you what you have been doing to everyone else for years. But even if I did that's none of your business is it.

Ricky: How the hell can you say that to me? That's my wife you arrogant son of bitch! (makes a lunge at Ben, but Clementine gets between him.)

Clementine: (Looks shocked at Ben wondering would he really sleep with Amy just to hurt Ricky. She knew he was still angry at Ricky, Amy, and all of his former friends, but would he really do such a horrific thing and destroy a family. She couldn't believe it.) Ben please tell me you're lying...

Ben: Clementine stay out of this. Ricky and I are having a private discussion. Please take an early lunch and lock the door to my office, and the elevator on your way out. Also inform security to disregard all that is being said and done.

Clementine: Ben what are you talking about? We should all calm down and talk this out, before something is said, or done that we'll all regret. (Very worried about the looks she see's on both Ben's face and Ricky's. She is worried that if she doesn't calm matters they will kill one another.)

Ben: Clementine, I'm done with regrets. The only thing I regret was ever meeting this little orphan bastard in front of me. Its time I settled this once and for all.

Ricky: (Pushes Clementine away) The only thing I regret is not beating this spoiled little rich boy when I had the chance.

Clementine: Guys come on you don't mean this. You two used to be friends, and you work together, lets just stay calm. (Still trying to stop this situation before it gets out of hand, but its long too late for that)

Ben: Clementine, Ricky and I have been a lot of things to each other, but we were never friends. (Looks more angry and determined than he ever has before.)

Ricky: Couldn't have said it better myself.

Clementine: Fine, if you two want to act like kids on the play ground fighting over a girl, then I'm out. (Leaves and follows Ben's instructions)

Ricky: I have always hated you. Always acting like you're so much better than me, when you're just a punk ass kid trying to be like your dad. (takes a swing at Ben.)

Ben: (Quickly moves from Ricky's arm range, grabs his arm turns around behind Ricky and elbows him to the lower back. Then turns to face Ricky before kneeing him in the stomach.) You sorry ass whiny womanizing asshole. You were never anything, but a lazy bastard who used people.

Ricky: (Falls to the ground stunned that Ben could fight so well. He is out of breath, he hasn't sparred with Jack at the gym in months and was shocked at Ben's fighting ability.) Don't get jealous that I could get the women you wanted. I was just a man who knew how to play the game, while you were just a kid who didn't even know the rules. (Gets, up takes off his jacket and throws it at Ben, who is shocked and blinded. Ricky then runs and tackles Ben to the ground and begins pummeling him with punches, until Ben knees him in the side and rolls him off.)

Ben: (Takes off his now torn jacket, and tie. Then awaits in Thai Chi fighting stance, that he learned from Eli & Marcus who were both Championship martial artist from ages 14 to 18 which is how they got their scholarship.) Game, is that all any of this was to you a fucking... Game. People aren't a game Ricky. But, then again I guess that's what we are to you. I mean look at you. You have Amy, John, and a new child, and yet you still like to play. Grow up. (Kicks Ricky in the shin before elbowing him in the face. Then puts Ricky in a headlock and pulls him sharply to the ground.)

Rick: (Punches Ben in the stomach, and stands up to kick Ben in his side.) What, I should grow up. You ran away from home for nearly ten years, and only come back after your father dies. You ran off like some child to cry, because you couldn't be a man.

Ben: (Grabs Ricky's leg, and sweeps him to the ground, and places him in an arm leg lock around the neck) I need to man up. Where were you for Amy and John when she was pregnant. I was the one who took all the ridicule, all the name calling, all the rumors so they would be okay where were you. You were trying to fuck Grace, fucking up Adrian in every form of the word, and using your abuse as an excuse.

Ricky: (punches Ben in the leg until he lets go. Catches his breath for a second before grabbing Ben in a headlock and squeezing.) Yes Ben I was abused, and I was scared. Scared that I would do the same thing to my son, and Amy that my dad did to me, and my mom. But, I changed so fuck you.

Ben: (Elbows, Ricky in the stomach, and breaks free. Then punches Ricky who falls backward over a table, and bumps his head against the sofa in Ben's office dazed.) Don't give me that shit Ricky. I was scared just like you, and I still did whatever I could to help you, Amy, John...Adrian, and everyone and it scared the shit out of me, but I was still there. You weren't scared you were just a coward, just like your father.

Ricky: (Gets up, and charges Ben angry for that comment. Slams Ben against the wall stunning him, and pummels his side careful not to hit him in the stomach again.) I am nothing like my father, I was scared, but I tried and you know that. But, what was your excuse. I warned you so why didn't you back off.

Ben: Slams his elbow into Ricky's back careful not to do spinal damage) I stayed because I cared, and they needed me, because that is what I was supposed to do.

Ricky: Why!? Why were you supposed to do anything, Amy, me, Adrian you didn't owe any of us anything so why? (grabs Ben and rolls on the floor tussling with him.

Ben: Because I could help them, and I could save them, when I couldn't save my mom...(This breaks up the fight)

Ben: (crying) Do you know what its like to watch someone you love slowly die, and know there is nothing you can do about it. I was a child, and I know there was nothing I could do to save my mom, but that still didn't make if feel any better for losing her. I saw Amy was just like that, and I could do something to help her so I tried, and when she didn't need me I left. But, I still needed something.

Ricky: What!

Ben: I needed to feel needed Ricky. To feel that everything I did was worth something, that she just didn't use me, and I know that is what she did. (drops to his knees.)

Ricky: She didn't use you Ben, I did. I used you because, I was broken, and I felt that my son and Amy deserved someone better than me (Crying) You were smart, kind, and good person better than me. I knew she needed that so I forced her to be with you, because I felt I owed her that much, that I owed my son that much...(Collapses bruised, hurt, and exhausted from their fight)

Ben: So why didn't you let me keep them?

Ricky: Because they were mine, and I'm selfish. Because of what my son's first word was when he was only seven months old? BEN!

Ben: What, John's first word was mom at ten months, Ben knew that because that is what Amy told him just weeks before their break up on a phone call from Palm Springs).

Ricky: No, its the first time he spoke to her. His first word was Ben. Remember that day I took him to stay at my apartment, right before she left.

Ben: Yeah, a few months after Robbie was born.

Ricky: You stopped by to bring me some things I had left, and played with him. When you walked out the door. He waved and said "Ben". I thought it was a fluke, so I picked him up and started to play with him. Then I started to ask him can you say Daddy? He looks at me, looks to the door, points and says "BEN". That is the day I truly started to hate you. You were the man that Amy needed, the man Adrian wanted me to be, and then you were the man "MY SON WANTED AS A FATHER" (sneers at that memory & at Ben.)

Ben: Please Ricky, everyone wanted you. If they didn't I wouldn't be the man I am now. John saying my name was just that a fluke.

Ricky: Really, if I was the one any of them wanted then why didn't they take me as I was. Why did they have to change me into this. (points at his attire.) I don't like wearing suits, Ben. I never wanted to work in a corporation, I was happy just working in the butcher shop, and living with Amy. I never wanted all of this. They did. Amy wanted this, Adrian wanted this, my parent's wanted this. Your dad wanted this for me. I didn't.

Ben: Then why didn't you tell them, Ricky? They would have understood.

Ricky: Because like you said Ben, I'm a coward. I didn't want to disappoint them. They liked me because I modeled this version of myself after you, they were happy but I haven't been happy in a very long time.

Ben: Adrian didn't want that for you. She would have loved you the way you were.

Ricky: Please, Adrian was driving herself insane with the olde me. I hated the old me. She wanted you, and she hated that you never wanted her, or that I wanted her. But, we both know that's a pile of shit.

Ben: What do you mean?

Ricky: We know each other too well Ben. I know that you wanted Adrian more than you even wanted Amy. You were just to full of self pity to admit it, just like I was too cowardly to admit I was jealous of you two.

Ben: Jealous of what? Adrian and I broke up, after our daughter died, because we could never get past that.

Ricky: Do you think you're past it now. You ran away for ten years Ben, but you come back every year to celebrate her birthday, and Adrian has only been to her grave once, and that was to be with you.

Ben: How did you know that? (Shocked at Ricky's observance of his life.)

Ricky: Because I visit your daughter too. I go there and I pray for forgiveness, for her dying, and not being there to help you and Adrian when you needed me. You think that I didn't care that she died, but I did. I cared that she lived, I cared about both you, and Adrian Ben. I owe my son's life, and my life to both you and Adrian. She taught me to be a better man, and to believe that I was worthy of being loved. You helped my son, and loved him when he wasn't even yours. (crying) You taught me how to love others, and how to be a better man with everything you did for me, Amy, John, and Adrian. You may not realize this, but I didn't want to be like your Dad, I wanted to be like you.

Ben: What a loser, who couldn't even keep the woman he loved from leaving him, or be the son my father wanted, so I left.

Ricky: Ben, you left because we asked too much of you, and you had nothing left to give. You cut out pieces of your soul for Amy, John, Me, Leo, Henry, Alice, Adrian, and your daughter. We were all just to stupid to appreciate it. I never blamed you for leaving, I would have left too, I have left. But we blamed our selves for making you not want to come back. I tried to fill your shoes, but I couldn't. I thought that I wanted to be like you Ben, but I never really understood until you left, that there was something about you that's different. That makes you special.

Ben: What ever that was I don't have it anymore. I don't think I ever did, I just pretended. I thought I could climb so high, and wasn't prepared when I fell so low. I have fallen so many times I don't feel like picking myself up. I understood you after I left. I saw how easy it is to just let your cares go away in one night of lurid sexual bliss, but it only lasts for so long before all those cares come back. I used to hate how you did women, making them fall for you then casting them away. I have done it on more than one occasion, you can love someone else, but the other person never really leaves you. Its better to leave that person when they are still strong enough to get over you, that way they can still keep going. I have had lots of women that I could have fallen in love with, but I never felt that I could love them because...

Ricky: Because of that one girl whose face you saw every time you slept with them. Because of every time you touched, kissed them, or when you said I love you to one of those girls, you were imagining her... I know.

Ben: No, I never let those words come out of my mouth unless I meant them. Which is why I haven't said them since Adrian and I broke up.

Ricky: I don't blame you for sleeping with Amy, Ben. You have been covering for me, since the day I met you. I haven't done one thing worthy of being your friend. All I have ever done was let your life fall apart, and used the pieces to build my own. You deserve to be with Amy.

Ben: I don't love Amy Ricky, I don't think I ever really loved her. I also didn't sleep with her either.

Ricky: But, the kiss?

Ben: It meant nothing. I just wanted to see if it would, and once we kissed I knew not even sleeping with Amy could erase Adrian from my mind. I have too much love for your son to destroy his family like that.

Ricky: Like I said you were always the better man. What am I going do?

Ben: That's on you. I'm done cleaning your messes up Ricky. I'm going to clean my own now.

Ricky: Why did we do all of this, if you never slept with Amy?

Ben: Because, I wanted to end this hostility, RIVALRY, or whatever it is once and for all. I'm tired of hating you, and myself Ricky. I'm tired of hating period. I have seen in my articles what hate does to people, and takes from people, and I was tired of it taking from me. Now excuse me. I have to go.

Ricky: Am I fired. Because I know how some people get fired for filing bad paper work. I just beat the shit out of my boss.

Ben: You never beat the shit out of me, and know I think you deserve a raise for taking that ass whipping I gave to you.

(Both men grab the other hand and pull the other up from the floor and do what they need to do...)

_**THE FINALE WILL BE UP LATER EXPECT AN EXCERPT I FOUND OF THJS CONVERSATION FROM THE ORIGINAL VERSION.**_


	8. Chapter 8

_**This next scene takes place after Ben's fight with Ricky. Ben is cleaned up but he has a black eye developing and despite his now cleaned up face, it he still looks like he's been in a fight. He shows up at the Law Offices of Enirquez & Lee. Adrian has dropped her previous last names from both Ben and Omar and returned it to Lee. Ben has just picked up the roses he had Clementine order from the florist. The receptionist will be played by Raven Symone.**_

**(Ben enters the office building with the roses in his left hand and a package containing his journal in the other.)**

Ben: Excuse me, I'm wondering if Adrian Lee is in her office.

Receptionist: Yes, she is sir do you have an appointment. (the receptionist is a young woman 26 years old, and seems to be checking Ben out.)

Ben: No, she's not expecting me. I was hoping to have a meeting with her if it's not too much trouble. (Ben feels awkward about his appearance after the fight with Ricky.

Receptionist: May I have your name sir? (Notices the bruises on Ben's face that are appearing, but still finds him attractive.)

Ben: Yes, tell her that her ex-husband Ben Boykewich is here to see her.

Receptionist: Ben Boykewich, the Sausage Prince? (looks surprised)

Ben: Yes, but I really don't like to be referred to as the "Sausage Prince". (Ben looks embarrassed by the nickname he never wanted.)

Receptionist: I'm sorry, but Adrian sometimes refers to you as that when she is speaking of you. (Looks at Ben flirtatiously)

Ben: Adrian speaks about me. (seems surprised)

Receptionist: Yes, she speaks of you often she refers to you as the one that got away. I can see why.

Ben: Looks almost hopeful of his chances with Adrian.

Receptionist: Right now she is with her other ex-husband, but I will let her know you are here.

Ben: Thank you. (Looks saddened at hearing Adrian was with Omar. He feels angry and depressed that he may have missed his chance with Adrian)

At that instant Adrian and Omar emerge from her office, talking like old friends and smiling. This makes the receptionist take notice as well, and looks up from her desk.

Omar: So dinner tonight? (Ask's Adrian who is smiling from ear to ear.)

Adrian: I would love too? (then takes Omar's hand, and kisses him on the cheek which makes Ben's heart drop from his chest.) Adrian then turns without noticing Ben and heads back into her office.

Omar" (Takes notice of Ben, and approaches him) Hi Ben, nice to see you. (holds out his hand for Ben to shake)

Ben: (Stands up and shakes his hand.) You too, (Looks angry and begins squeezing Omar's hand which causes Omar to take notice.)

Omar: Don't worry Ben, I gave up on Adrian you have no fear of me. (then lets go of Ben's hand and approaches the receptionist desk.) So are you ready to go, Karen?

Karen (Receptionist): Yeah, just let me get my jacket, and talk to Adrian right quick.

Adrian: Karen, I thought you and Omar were going to lunch. (surprised that Karen who started dating Omar, has not left for their lunch date.)

Karen: I am, but I have to let you know that your other ex-husband is outside. He looks like shit, but he is still looking fine!

Adrian: What do you mean, he's here? What do you mean he looks like shit? (Surprised at this news, and shocked.)

Karen: Check the security cam on the view screen. (grabs the tv remote and press the 00 button to view the front office where she and Adrian see Ben sitting down looking different than his normal calm, and confident self. The look on his face now reminds Adrian of that awkward nerd she married in high school. This makes a smile come to her face as she see's him looking so nervous as he waits to speak with her.)

Adrian: Why is he here? What does he want? Is he here to see my dad, one of the other attorney's or me? (Adrian looks nervous, yet hopeful)

Karen: Girl look at what's in the man's hands. I don't think he brought flowers and candy for your dad. If he did then, you need to talk to your dad, and really reconsider your feelings for that man.

Adrian: So you think he is here to see me. About what?

Karen: About what you have been crying your eyes out about since, you saw him again.

Adrian: Really, do you really think he wants to be with me again? (looks hopeful.)

Karen: If he doesn't would he be here y? (Karen get's irritated.) Girl I can't get you, Omar is fine, but Damn you gave up a good looking born rich man like that?

Adrian: First off he didn't look like that until now. Secondly I told you the circumstances with us were wrong.

Karen: Wrong, you took his virginity in the backseat of his car in front of your house, to get back at your cheating boyfriend, and his fake ex-girlfriend. Adrian that's how my parent's met.

Adrian: You know how we got started, but you also know how we ended.

Karen: Adrian, that's not how you and Ben started. Your relationship started long before that night, but you two were too dumb to realize it. It ended when you both gave into the pain of losing your child. Right now you and he have another chance to have what you and Omar never could have. Something I am hoping to have with him. So don't blow it.

Adrian: Are you sure he's here to try again. (looks scared and sad, yet hopefully)

Karen: If he wasn't Adrian would he be here? (takes Adrian's face and looks at her), Now go get your man, while I go get your other one. (Grabs her jacket. and heads for the door to meet Omar. Before she leaves she stops by the door and speaks with Ben.  
Look, that girl in there is more than just my boss. She's my sister from another mister. If you hurt her I promise I'll hurt you a lot worse than she or anyone else ever did. (Ben looks at her surprised. How could she know so much.) Yeah, I know the whole story between the two of you including how she slept with your best friend. She did some pretty fucked up shit to a lot of people, but Adrian only regretted what she did to you. She's not perfect, and she always hated how perfect you were. She hated how the one time you weren't perfect made her hate you. She hated herself even more when she realized that you were allowed to have some imperfections.

Ben: If I wanted to hurt Adrian, I wouldn't be here. I just hope me being here is the right thing for both of us. (Feels uneasy about the entire situation.)

Karen: Look here Sausage Boy love isn't perfect, and that is where you and Adrian got screwed up. She thinks its about loving someone despite their imperfections, and you think its being perfect for someone. But love is just accepting someone for who they are and how they make you feel. Nothing is perfect or imperfect, its confusing I know, but that's what makes falling in love so grand. Being in love is hard work. I know you and she aren't lazy so start working.

Ben: I will, and thanks for the advice.

Karen: Thank you. Now that you are back, I don't feel guilty about hooking up with her other ex. But, if things don't work out for either of us "Call Me" (holds her hand in the shape of a phone to her ear in the gesture as she walks out the door.)

Adrian: Ben, Hi are you here to see my dad? (She asks hoping to be subtle.)

Ben: No, we both know that I came here to see you. (gaining back his former confidence. He doesn't want to let Adrian gain the upper hand as she usually did when they were in high school. At the same time he doesn't want himself to gain control over the situation either. Ben wants whatever they are going to do in this situation from getting back together or walking away from one another forever to be totally equal.)

Adrian: So, why are you here to see me? I thought you would be with Adrian now that she and Ricky have split. (Trying to gain control over the situation. and herself she doesn't want Ben to hurt her again.)

Ben: I'm here to apologize for how I acted at the cemetery. I was angry, sad, and honestly I didn't want you to comfort me. I don't like being comforted Adrian. At the time I really didn't want to be comforted by you.

Adrian: Well that is what you said. So I shouldn't be surprised, you wanted to be comforted by Amy not me.

Ben: Adrian that's not what I mean.

Adrian: Then what do you mean, Ben?

Ben: I mean that I didn't want to remind myself of what I felt, and of who I felt it for. I don't love Amy, Adrian. I don't think I ever did. Amy was just the person who I thought I should love, because of the situation she was in. She was who I thought I wanted, or forced myself to want because it distracted me from feeling what I did for you.

Adrian: And what do you feel for me, Ben? Do you love me because I was your first? Do you love me because of our daughter, and you feel you have to love me. Or do you hate me for how I hurt you when I kicked you out of the condo. Do you hate me for how I slept with your best friend. Or for how I chose Omar and Ricky over you? Or do you hate me because I lost our daughter and you blame me for her death. God Knows I am the reason why she died, and you know that's why she died. Because she couldn't be born to a slut like me. The woman who took her father's virginity, and got pregnant for revenge. Which is it.

Ben: Its for all of that, and I still love you Adrian. Because, I could never hate you Adrian, no matter how hard I tried. I tried to hate you for everything you said and more, but I couldn't. So I left, because I didn't want to see you happy with someone else. Because I didn't want to feel love for you, what you felt for someone else. I tried to find someone else that made me feel the way you made me feel, and I couldn't. I tried lots of times, and each time I tried I would see your face. I thought after I left that love at first sight was a myth, but now I know that it wasn't.

Adrian: Amy was the girl you fell in love with at first sight Ben.

Ben: The first girl I ever saw Adrian was you.

Adrian: What are you talking about.

Ben: You were wearing a white shirt, with black pants, and you hair was in curls. You had silver hooped ear rings in your ears leaning against your locker holding your baton, and talking too Ricky. I didn't see Amy until after I saw you. I originally wanted Grace, but I could never really love her. It was Alice that saw Amy and pointed her out to me. But, you were the person I saw first and fell in love with. Dylan was pointed out to me by Henry. You were the one I wanted from the beginning. I just never let myself believe it, because I could never understand how things between us became so wrong. (Shedding tears.) When I was with Amy Adrian, I would have to force myself to try and be there, she made me feel needed. But you made me feel free to have a choice to be there. You were so strong and independent. I never understood how I could feel so happy, and free with you. But, I could never feel that with Amy, or anyone else. I felt weak, and ashamed when I wasn't able to help you deal with losing Mercy. I hated myself and you for losing her, because I thought that if we really loved each other then something like that wouldn't have happened. I could never understand how loving you and being so happy cause our daughter to die. But, I realize now that bad things happen no matter how hard you try, and you have to accept that. But, I couldn't I wanted to blame it on me, on you, on us. I thought that Mercy paid for our sins.

Adrian: So do I. That's why I decided not too be with you. I thought Mercy dying was proof we were wrong for each other. So I wanted to keep you far away from me, and find something with anyone. I thought I had found it with Omar because you and he are actually pretty similar, but he wasn't you, and no matter how hard I tried I could never love him. But, how do I know that if love you Ben, I thought I loved Ricky and look how that turned out.

Ben: What did you originally want to name Mercy? (Ben looked intently at Adrian who looked shocked at his question)

Adrian: What?

Ben: When we found out you were having a girl we both agreed that if we were going to have a boy I would name him. If we would have a girl you would name her. What was the name you chose.

Adrian: (Looking at Ben sadly, and crying.) I wanted to name her after your mom Sarah.

Ben: Why did you choose that name? (knowing the answer already.)

Adrian: I chose it because after she how you and your dad talked about her I couldn't have thought of a better name for her. the way you and Leo would talk about the great woman she was, and the memories you two had of her, and how happy she made the both of you. I wanted our daughter to have that same impact on people. When she died I couldn't give her that name because I knew it would bring you even more pain, and I couldn't do that to you. I chose Mercy because I wanted some forgiveness to be given to you, me, and her.

Ben: Do you know the name I wanted to choose if we had a boy.

Adrian: No.

Ben: I wanted to name him Antonio. Because I knew how important he was to you, and how everytime you thought of him it made you smile.

Adrian: Ben, even if what we felt was real, how do we know if we both will feel that way agian.

Ben: We can use your last kiss theory and figure that out. We aren't the same kids we were in high school, but I think the same rules still apply.

Adrian: But, what if you feel something and I don't or I feel something and you don't, or we both feel nothing.

Ben: Then we will know and accept, but I can't go on not knowing Adrian. I might be older and I have achieved a lot in my life, but I still feel as if I'm holding my breath. NO matter who I am with I can't breathe or live. It feels like I'm drowning and I need air, the only time I felt I could breathe was when I was with you.

The two looked at one another and Adrian stood up from her desk and approached Ben who stood standing wearing a sleek blue shirt, and put down the roses, and his journal. They looked at one another and Ben took Adrian's face into his hands and looked deeply into her eyes. She looked at him and they kissed.  
**(LISTEN TO THE JORDAN SPARX & CHRIS BROWN SONG "NO AIR")**

Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air

If I should die before I wake  
It's 'cause you took my breath away  
Losing you is like living in a world with no air  
Oh

_[Chris Brown]_  
I'm here alone, didn't wanna leave  
My heart won't move, it's incomplete  
Wish there was a way that I can make you understand

_[Jordin]_  
But how do you expect me  
to live alone with just me  
'Cause my world revolves around you  
It's so hard for me to breathe

_[Chorus:]_  
Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air  
Can't live, can't breathe with no air  
It's how I feel whenever you ain't there  
It's no air, no air  
Got me out here in the water so deep  
Tell me how you gonna be without me  
If you ain't here, I just can't breathe  
It's no air, no air

No air, air  
No air, air  
No air, air  
No air, air

_[Chris Brown]_  
I walked, I ran, I jumped, I flew  
Right off the ground to float to you  
There's no gravity to hold me down for real

_[Jordin]_  
But somehow I'm still alive inside  
You took my breath, but I survived  
I don't know how, but I don't even care

_[Both:]_  
So how do you expect me  
to live alone with just me  
'Cause my world revolves around you  
It's so hard for me to breathe

_[Chorus]_

No air, air  
No air, air  
No air, air  
No air, air  
No more  
It's no air, no air

_[Chorus]_

No air, air  
No air, air  
No air, air  
No air, air

Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air  
Can't live, can't breathe with no air  
It's how I feel whenever you ain't there  
It's no air, no air

Got me out here in the water so deep  
Tell me how you gonna be without me  
If you ain't here, I just can't breathe  
It's no air, no air

No air, air  
No air, air  
No air, air  
No air

For the first time in a very long time Ben, and Adrian could both feel free as if they could live again. Adrian looked at Ben and it her whole life became clear. Ben felt the same as if for once in his dark and cloudy life he could see the sun. No matter what he did before only this moment here with her seemed to be real, everything else was a dream.

Ben: So did you feel anything?

Adrian: No, I think I need to try again. (Kissing Ben intimately and passionately one more time.

Ben: I think I'm confused now, and need another opinion. (Placing his arms around Adrian as she wrapped hers around his neck and giving into each other.)

They then broke from their kiss and leaned their heads against one another.

Ben: Hi.  
Adrian: Hey.

Ben: I missed you.

Adrian: I missed you too.

Ben: If we are going to do this you'll need to read this. (gives her his journal.)

Adrian: What's this? (takes the package and opens it.)

Ben: Its' me. Who I truly am, no illusion, no lies about who I am. Read it, then burn it. Even after that kiss Adrian I don't want to be with you until you know exactly who I was, what I did, how I did it, and what that made me feel. This journal is my soul, my true self. Once you read it really read it and understand me. I want you to burn it.

Adrian: Burn it? Ben why would you want me to burn this book if its so important to you.

Ben: Because I won't need it any longer. I'm tired of hiding who I am from everyone, especially myself. When you finish reading it let me know what you want to do. That is the only way we can try, if we try at all. (He then turned and left.)


End file.
